On September 8, 2016, I attempted suicide.
I don't remember much from my first few days in the hospital. However, I do remember the nurses that made my stay bearable.
When you're admitted to the hospital for a suicide attempt, they have a nurse or someone similar watch you all night and all day to ensure you don't harm yourself. At first, I hated the idea of someone watching me sleep, checking in on me in the bathroom every few minutes, but I understood why. It wasn't until I got to know some of those who watched me that I started to really appreciate them being there.
One of the nurses that really stuck with me was an older woman, I can't recall her name but I remember her face. She made it her mission to get to know me and talk to me while she was watching me. She did her job but she also made me feel like there are some good people left in the world. When she spoke to me she didn't speak to me as if I was just another patient who attempted suicide, she spoke to me like I was a human being. The doctors popped in and out to tell me that I had this and that and that they're treating me for it. They never stuck around to explain to me what was going on or explain what the treatment actually entailed, but the nurses did.
After I was moved from the ICU to a regular room a nurse named Katiri was assigned to me. She sat down with me and told me about herself, she made me laugh on one of the worst days of my life and I will always be thankful of that. Before her shift with me ended, she went down to the gift shop and brought me magazines and candy and told me that I would be okay. She told me that I was a strong person and that life gets better, and that I would get through whatever was happening.
Although it may not seem much to most, these women did something for me that I would never be able to thank them for. They made me want to live again. They showed me that there are still good people who actually care for others.
To the nurses that gave me hope,
Thank you for making me want to be alive again.
