After my abusive relationship, my idea of love was shattered. I figured there was no point in even trying anymore. When we met, I was beginning to pick the pieces back up. I wasn’t looking for anything serious. I wasn’t looking at all. All the same, your timing could not have been more perfect. You welcomed the slow pace in which our relationship started. From just talking through texts and short phone calls to casual dates and then before I knew it I was ready to jump in head first.

I will never be able to thank you enough for being so understanding. You have held my hand through countless panic attacks, talked me through uncomfortable situations, and understood my bad days. You praise my accomplishments; as little and meaningless as they may seem. And, you only want what is best for me and my health.

But I am also sorry. I am sorry that you did not get the strong independent girl I use to be. I know you see glimpses of her and I wish those were permanent. I am sorry that you have to deal with my past. I wish it could all go away. I wish you didn’t have to deal with my baggage.

When I told you, what happened I cried uncontrollably because I was terrified of your reaction. Most men could not handle my past with as much grace as you did. But you swallowed your personal feelings and asked how you could help. Instead of telling me to suck it up or asking me not to talk about it because it made you uncomfortable, you listened and took me seriously. While you may not understand to the full extent how or why my past affects me, you have never once held it against me or made me feel bad because of it. I am forever grateful for that.

Thank you for listening to me talk after my therapy appointments. Thank you for always answering your phone when I have nightmares. Thank you for always keeping your voice level and calm if we argue because you know what yelling does to me. I don’t know how you do it. You are my superman.

While I didn’t need you to save me I did need someone to let me experience a healthy relationship. You taught me how a healthy couple deals with problems and works together to be happy. I needed you to force me to see the world differently. You are one of the kindest souls I have met. You’re always willing to do whatever you need to for someone you love. I am so appreciative to have someone who I can look up to.

I will never understand how you handle it all so well. I hope you know that if ever you need it, I will return the support. In the short time that we have shared together you’ve become my best friend. I can tell you anything and you don’t freak out or shudder at the horror of it. Most importantly you love me anyway. You love me despite my worst days, despite my bad habits. You’re so strong for being able to do that.

So, thank you. Thank you for everything you have done. Thank you for helping me pick up my pieces but also respecting me enough to know I am capable of doing it on my own. Thank you for being the kind person you are. You have helped me carry so much of my baggage without me even asking. I love you more than you will ever know.