To the guy that was never my boyfriend.
When you are at a family party and your uncle asks “So do you have a boyfriend?” It always makes it so uncomfortable. How can I explain to my uncle what “talking” is? You were never my boyfriend but I never knew what to classify you as.
The only time you truly learn a lesson, is experiencing it the hard way. If I looked past the bullshit you fed me, it was pretty clear that you didn't care like I ever did.
If a guy says “I don't want to make it official, because Im not ready for a real relationship”… RUN.. As fast and far as you can. All that means is your just another girl to him.
He may be the one you always think about, but he doesn't think about you like that. So why settle? I do understand the girls that wait around for guys, I myself have fell into the trap way to many times.
All you want is him, no matter how it is portrayed. Even if it is not the exact situation you wanted, you think “this is better than nothing”.. but Im here to burst your bubble because you are worth so much more than that.
Love is one of the very few things that we get to chose ourselves, so why settle for anything less than someone that loves you, for you.
You don't deserve to be waiting up till 2 am hoping for a phone call for him to come over, you deserve someone that is already down to do whatever you were doing, even if it was a Netflix night.
Love is not always worrying, or constantly fixing yourself for your partner, love is accepting who you are and not wanting to change a single thing about the person.
So to the guy that was never my boyfriend, thank you. As strange as it sounds, you broke my heart but also help me build it right back up by realizing that there wasn't anything wrong with me. It wasn't because you weren't ready for a relationship, it was because I was so consumed in you I didn't even care how poorly you treated me or how much of a doormat I was for you. Its one of those lessons I wouldn't wish on my wort enemy. Not being good enough for someone you would have done anything for is an indescribable feeling. You feel stupid, worthless, and every other name in the book, but when you you take a step back and actually look at the situation, the only person that lost was you. You lost a person that saw past all your flaws and still wanted you for you.
To the girl that is staying with the guy who doesn't treat them right, just know you are worth more than you give yourself credit for. Putting out love and not receiving it back makes you the strongest version of yourself. Loving to hard is looked down on in todays society, but to be honest, fuck what society thinks because the people who do love, are the ones who make the world a better place. Just think about how much happier you will be when you meet someone that gives the same effort you do, that is the man you deserve, and never forget that.
