Formal recruitment is a stressful time filled with thoughts of self-doubt and anxiety.

From the long walks to the houses to the constant question of where you will belong, formal recruitment is one rollercoaster of emotions. The process, which has been used for several years here at the University of Oklahoma, is one that truly breaks down a woman into several categories. The past few days of rush, I have overheard by several that this year was possibly one of the worst formal recruitments OU has experienced. Whether this rumor is true or not, rushing does not define your happiness, worth or belonging at OU.

Several things can happen during formal recruitment, good and bad. Some possibilities are that your top choices cut you and you end up in a house that you never considered or saw yourself in. You can also end up being in a house where you don't know anyone since your friends ended up in another house. Or you could get cut within the first few days or last two. Options like these can sometimes lead to the constant battle of if you should withdraw or continue with the process. As a female student who is trying to find herself in the OU community, most of these options are not favored and can be devastating at first.

But actually, they're not.

Rush for girls sucks in all honesty. You go in the first few days nervous yet excited to meet all 11 wonderful houses just to be cut without any explanation. If you're welcomed back to as many houses as you can, then you're left with the pressure of deciding which houses won't make your party list. Parties can go from 25 minutes long to 75 minutes, which can seem like a total bust since you're often placed with a new girl or one that doesn't carry on a conversation very well. Many girls question if their lack of being an extrovert, not wearing the "right clothes" or going to public school ruined their chances. Girls who are sophomores or are not from Norman, Oklahoma feel this pressure especially since it seems like you don't stand a chance. If a house is really looking for genuine girls, then none of that will matter. This rejection might feel like your next four years are determined, but again they're not. As cliche as this may sound, things happen for a reason.

The system isn't fair or flawless, but rather a reality check that some things are out of our hands. Again, letters do not define your worth, social life or happiness at OU. There are TONS of clubs, groups and people here in Norman, Oklahoma and at OU that are always looking to accept new members. To those who are in a house, do not worry about being in "the right one." Chances are you nor anyone else can determine that, but ultimately you. Not to mention that OU has many resources and individuals who are willing to educate and inform others about other positions they can hold on campus. You do not need a sorority to feel at home at OU. If anything, Norman alone is SUPER welcoming to all.

To the girls who didn't finish formal recruitment because of whatever reason, do not feel upset or ashamed. There was nothing you could do, but be yourself. Some things are out of our control and this just happens to be one of them. I know I sound like a broken record, but your happiness and worth are not by any means determined because of this. At the moment this was hectic, but later in life, you'll look back at this and laugh. Plenty of girls at OU don't rush and they still have an AMAZING four years to look back at. In the end, you should find something that brings the best out of you and makes you grow as an individual here at OU.

Whether Greek life was for you or not, you are for sure to find something you hold dearly to your heart here on campus.