Society still tells us that our lives are supposed to unfold a certain way to be “successful” or “happy.”
Graduate high school. Go to college. Graduate college. Get a job. Get married. Have kids. Somewhere in there you might further your education, but only if you're "smart enough." It’s the same banter we’ve been hearing for years.
I have decided that I am not solely here to slap a ring on my finger and produce children. If these steps become part of my life, awesome! If not, that's okay too.
But I am here to do great things. To become successful, no matter how I define success at the time or what anyone else says success looks like. I am here to travel and see as many beautiful things, people and places as I can. I’m here to listen to live music, to enjoy the fresh air, to fully experience life and to write…all on my own time.
I think married-with-children-house-in-the-suburbs living is a beautiful thing, for people who dream of having that. I also think working-your-ass-off-in-grad-school is a beautiful thing. And who’s to say spending-all-of-your-hard-earned-money-on-traveling isn’t beautiful either?
Not everybody aches for the same life so why is everybody lumped into the same category of success or failure?
I recently read Sophia Amoruso’s "#GIRLBOSS" and I recommend it to women and men alike. Within those pages, I learned about the process of finding myself, how to take risks and really how to discover what my purpose and passions are. I learned how to fight for what I want and to believe in myself. These probably aren’t exactly the takeaways Amoruso had in mind, but that’s the beauty of learning and growing. This book is so fulfilling, sarcastic, humorous and real that it has opened up a new light in my life.
It hasn’t made me want to drop everything and start my own business—I’m not ready for that step quite yet. But it has left me undeniably inspired to spread the love to all of the other #GIRLBOSSes out there who aren’t marching to the beat of society’s drum and instead, are constructing their own rhythm. You know who you are.
There are so many smart, talented, beautiful, kind, witty women looking the norm in the face and confidently shouting, or maybe even politely whispering, “No.” They should be celebrated for their triumphs, their trials, their wins and their losses, not for whether they’re on the “fast track to the perfect life” or not.
Some are in graduate school, some are working 9-5 and some are struggling with an addiction. Some are saving a lot of money while some are spending a lot of money. Some are saving lives and some are working 60 hours a week in sales. Some work out every day and some struggle to make it to the gym. Some have three jobs and some have none. Some have kids and some don't. Some are traveling every chance they get while others are attending a concert at least once a month. Some are chasing their professional dreams and some are trying to figure out what that looks like.
No one journey is perfect or right, but it's all about who you're really making those decisions for.
No matter what your path looks like—even if your path has taken a detour—make sure you’re doing it because it’s what you want to do. Not because your parents, your S.O., your professors or society tells you it’s the right route. Not because you know people who have lived “happily ever after” by choosing it. And not because it looks good on someone else’s social media account.
Do it for you.
You’re the one who has to wake up motivated for it, who has to go to bed ready to worry about it. This is your life; don’t live it on someone else’s terms.
