To The Girl Who Doesn't Fit In

There are two types of girls in the world: the girls who just know how to make friends and always have things to talk about and the girls who wonder how they do it.

I am the second type of girl. For the first type of girl it seems so easy to sit down on the bus, or in a new class, or even on the elevator and just start talking away to the girl beside them. Then, before you know it, it's like those two are best friends.

"When did you two meet?"

"Oh we met back in middle school on the bus one morning and we've been friends ever since."

....How? How do they do it? I'm such an awkward person. Making friends has never been something that comes naturally to me. I wasn't the girl who met their best friend in kindergarten and still religiously talks to them every day. I had a small collection of best friends off and on throughout my middle school and high school years, but none that instantly became my closet confidant.

I don't mind being alone most of the time. I enjoy peace and quiet. But sometimes I wonder if it's normal to feel like I don't really fit in. I wonder if it's normal to be absolutely OK with that fact.

I don't drink. I don't party. I don't gossip. In general I suppose I'm a pretty boring person. I like to be outside when the weather's nice, I like to read, I like to watch Netflix for hours, I like to eat, I like to drink coffee, I like to craft, and I like to bake. All fairly normal hobbies. Yet I still feel like I don't fit in. I always listen in on other girls' conversations (everyone does it, no judgement here), and I notice them talking about other girls, partying, boys, fashion, and celebrities. Am I narrow minded for just not caring about that? Am I lame for not caring about what Sally said to Bob on Saturday night? Am I old fashioned for finding it mildly obnoxious to listen to stories that include "OMG", "like", and "I can't even"? No, I'm just different.

I've learned to accept my nerdy loner persona and just roll with the punches. Fitting in is overrated. There are so many girls who do actually enjoy things like partying, gossiping, discussing the latest trendy styles and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that, but there are also girls who pretend to enjoy those things out of fear of seeming different. God made you just as you are. We are not meant to pretend to be people we are not, because that strips us of what God believed would make us beautifully unique.

So being patient is the best thing you can do. It's not about how many friends you can have, it's about the quality of the friendship you have with them. Whether it's 30 or just one, the importance of friendship is to give you someone to talk to, listen to, enjoy things with, and share laughs with. Never silence who you are out of the fear that no one will accept it. Someone always will, it just takes time. Hang in there!

"We're all a little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love."

--Dr. Seuss