I recently read an article titled, "The Value of Showing Up for a Friend" and it stopped me in my tracks. The words in this article rang so true -- "Friends speak soft truth — even when the truth is hard. They also show up, stay in the game and offer love for those who are hurting."
After reading these words, I began to think about the people in my life who have shown me the value of showing up for a friend. The most recent accounts of the value of showing up for a friend would be in my last two years of college. College years are obviously some of the hardest as there are transitions, changes, and challenges. It's important to surround yourself with people that you know will show up for you. People that you know will sit with you through your pain, hold your hand through the hard times, and simply be there when no one else is to be found. However, I think that I can truly say that I learned about the value of showing up for a friend when I was in high school and went through a time when true friends were far and few between. Since then, I've become more aware of what it means to show up for my friends, and I've also taken more notice to who decides to show up for me. To the friends that have shown up for me when I needed you most, this article is for you.
You might be wondering what exactly I mean when I say "Showing up for a friend." Honestly, it's exactly what it sounds like. Showing up when the going is tough. Showing up even when you don't have the words to say. Showing up because you're a friend, not because it's always convenient. I remember my freshman year of high school. I was only 14 and I underwent a serious spinal surgery. I was home from school for 21+ days. I missed school days and normal activities, but most of all, I was lonely. In the midst of this valley, two friends showed up for me. They showed up, but others didn't. It was then that I realized that a simple text is not always enough. We live in such a fast-paced world where social media has taken the place of face-to-face interaction and when my "friends" at the time were too busy and too wrapped up in their own lives to be there for me when mine was brought to a standstill, I realized the value in showing up for other people. To the two friends that took the time to care, thank you for showing up for me.
When I went to college, I found that the people willing to show up for you would stick around and even more so, I didn't have to be around people that wouldn't show up for me. That was a revelation for me -- finally understanding that I can be friends with those who really want to be friends with me, too.
Through the really tough stuff, like the stuff that's even harder than your bad Biology test grade and your flat tire, you need people in college that are willing to show up for you even when you can't stand up on your own two feet. And in turn, you need to be that kind of friend for others because life is too short not to really love on others. It's too short to be so busy that we miss out on real-life relationships with other people, and it's too short to text one another with our condolences and "I am here for you" statements.
Bottom line: We need to show up for other people and we need to surround ourselves with people that are going to be willing to show up for us. To those that have shown up for me -- thank you for being there, even when your own life was plagued with hurt. Thank you for showing up for me even when I couldn't stand up myself. Thank you for taking the time out of your busy life to help make mine a little better. Most importantly, thank you for teaching me the importance of showing up for a friend.
