There are a lot of things out of your control, but in a situation like this, what are you supposed to do? All you want to do is pour yourself into your friend and help them build themselves back up and gain confidence in themselves but there is only so much you can say. To them, they have become unraveled. Either they cheated, or got cheated on and nothing is the same for them since so much has changed.
The first question you can ask yourself is why would they do this? They don’t seem like this person--they are kind, sweet, and always in the mood to have a good time drama-free. You are confused. You are far away and can’t get to them and all you want to do is be right there to take their pain and put it on yourself so you can see them become who they once were.
The truth is that once you cheat or have been cheated on, you see your friend change. Over time they get over what happened and they become a better person from the situation. Cheating is the most immature action one can do--it's selfish and hurts more than just the person it happened to. If you have cheated, it’s not the end of the road but it’s almost a test as to where you are right now in your life. It’s a wake-up call that gives you almost a second chance. From your mistakes you build yourself back up and begin to do things the right way. Although, sometimes they don’t. They act out and become mad at the world, break down piece by piece and just feel sorry for themselves.
A non-cheater or one who has never been cheated on I guess doesn’t know how they really feel, but being a friend of both situations makes you a stronger and wiser friend. You know what you have to do and it’s just to be there for them. The only job you have is the take a step back and let them know that you’re always there no matter how they feel. Cheating breaks down more than just the person it affected. It breaks down friendships.
So to those who feel as though they've let themselves down:
Don’t feel sorry for yourself. It happened and there’s nothing you can do that can take you back in time to slap yourself in the face for your actions. It’s basically rock bottom. The only positive to rock bottom is that you can't get any lower, only higher.
Keep your head up--us friends will never leave you. If we stayed with you before, we will stay with you now. Always remember that you’re loved, and deserve love even if you believe you don’t anymore. Distract yourself and take up new hobbies to help yourself get over the pain. It hurts, but pain doesn’t last forever.
There perfect person for you exists and for now, we are your soulmates because we will never disappear from your life. Can’t wait to see what’s in store for your life and what’s to come.
