Hey, it's me. Your old friend. Remember me? We used to hang out all the time. You and I used to talk on the phone at least once daily, texting, and snap-chatting in between. You used to tell me all of your secrets, and I'd tell you mine. Now those secrets are just pushed back into my mind with only little memories attached to them. The exact phone call where I realized we were not friends anymore absolutely crushed me. I was driving through Chicago. I understand freshman year in college is fun and different, but it kind of sucked when you just decided that we weren't going to be friends anymore. I am so happy that you have found new friends and the college life is treating you well. Do you wish the same for me though? I'd like to hope so, but I don't know anymore. It's hard watching you change and try to find yourself throughout this journey. Being one year older has given me the opportunity to experience college before you so I am already settled in. I know what clubs I want to be apart of, I know what types of people I want to surround myself around are like. You have yet to figure that out, and there is nothing wrong with that, I just wish I could've helped you along the way. Do you realize that I still care about you more than a lot of people in my life? I hope so, I promised you I would forever. I don't like to admit to myself that you are changing and maybe we just aren't meant to be friends anymore because of our past. We have gone through so much together, why throw that all away? Knowing our siblings still hang out hurts me because that used to be us. We all used to be the fantastic-four. As much as I miss the old days, there are new days to be created. It will be weird not having you in them, but I guess that's for the better. You were honestly one of the last people I ever thought I'd lose as a friend, so that's probably why I'm taking this so hard. Hearing songs that we used to jam out to reminds me of all the good times. It also reminds me of all the bad times that you thought you were too cool for me. I get it, you were a senior in high school, we were all that way at some point in our lives.I think about our weddings and if we will even be a part of each other's. We planned those when we were little. We had everything figured out, we were going to be each others maid-of-honor's. If anything, I'd still like to attend yours.
I don't mean to write this letter to you as in the form of hatred. I just want you to know that I miss you, and really hope you enjoy the rest of your college career without me. I don't want to keep getting my hopes up and get let down anymore with you. I don't want to pretend like you care and will never judge me anymore. I don't want to have someone in my life that won't be by my side 110% of the time. I will always be there for you if you need me, because that's how I've always been with you. I'm glad I can be that steady person in your life - just please don't get me to believe that you can be that person for me anymore. As I said before, I really hope you're doing well, and college is going great. I hope you and your boyfriend last forever because he treats you so well. I hope mom, dad, and brother are doing well. I hope your dog is running around like crazy, full of love and energy as she always used to be. I hope someday you realize that we were really good for each other, and it could've been a really great long-lasting friendship. I hope you find your forever friend soon.
Love,
Your old best-friend.
