I'm not going to sugar coat the fact that I'm a lot to deal with. I'm an adorably complicated mess, simply put.
You should know:
1. I have this massive wall up.
I had my heart broken too severely, too many times, too soon. It took me a while to put those pieces back together, so I'll need you to be patient with the time it will take for me to let you in.
2. I have no desire to be spoiled with material things.
Spoil me with compliments and spoil me with loyalty. There's likely nothing you can buy me that I can't buy myself.
And if by chance I can't - my dad can, so you won't be able to spend your way to my heart.
3. I've gotten insanely comfortable with solitude.
Sometimes I isolate myself to get my head back in order.
There may be days when I want to go to dinner and a movie, without you. I hope you learn to be okay with that.
4. I have a bad attitude but I'm really sensitive.
Hypocritical as it may be, some days I can dish it but I just can't take it. Sorry (not sorry).5. 38% of the time you look over at me, I'll probably be taking selfies.
You'll get used to it.
6. I've already got my kids' names picked out.
It's really not up for debate. My wedding song may or may not be picked out, too. I don't know though.
7. My family is my everything.
If you don't impress them, you won't make it too far with me. I don't plan on living more than three hours away from my parents.... like ever. So I hope you like Michigan!
8. You'll be the one to teach me what love is.
I've been in relationships, but I was young. I truly believe I have never been loved correctly. You better shape up.
9. Car rides with me will either be a nightmare or a blast.
One minute I'll be disrespectfully murdering a Nicki Minaj verse, the next minute I'll be crying to Adele. If you're lucky, I'll be in the mood to sing Disney songs all day....You'll get used to it.
10. No matter how great you are, you will always be a close third to my father and my brother for the main man position in my life.
This, honey, is not negotiable.
11. I relate to all of the crazy girlfriend memes on a spiritual level.
I wish it was a lie!!!
12. The Spice Girls said it best, you gotta get with my friends.
It's gotta be so good that when they third wheel, it doesn't feel like a third wheel. If they intimidate you, rather than excite you - you probably aren't the one.
13. My faith is mine, and no one else's.
You'll have to accept the ways I worship, the times I worship, and the days I worship. And since I'm 100% sure God is crafting you especially for me, I'm gonna need you to believe in Him.
14. I'm a littttttttttttttttttle wild.
Margarita is my favorite word. Dance floor is my favorite location. Much like Miley, I can't be tamed (at least not in my twenties) so please don't try.
15. I have learned to accept me for exactly who I am.
It's taken a while, it's taken a lot - and it's nothing I'm willing to sacrifice for you.
I'm well aware of all of my flaws but over time I've learned that they don't make me any less wonderful. I'll need you to promise to be patient with me.
Some days I'm insanely dramatic. In those moments, I hope you will smile, kiss my forehead, and tell me to relax. Some days I'll complain about my weight just moments before I ask you to take me to endless shrimp at Red Lobster. On those days, I hope you'll ignore my complaints and have a shrimp eating contest with me. Some days I'll be angry with you without any explanation. On those days, I hope you learn to read my mind (or at least remember that I'm a sucker for yellow roses). Some days I will cling to you like a leech and it will annoy you, other days I'll need some me time and that may annoy you too. Whether it's a clingy day, or an isolation day - I hope you'll just be patient with me. Some days I'll want nothing more than cookie dough and familiar episodes of my favorite TV shows. On those days, I hope you'll come downstairs with my favorite blanket and be ready for hours of me crying over Game of Thrones or Grey's Anatomy. Some Saturdays I'll wake up early in the morning and want to make breakfast dancing to Madonna in my underwear. On those days, I hope you'll forgive me for ruining your only day to sleep in, and I hope you know every single word to "Like A Prayer". Some days I'll boast about my independence to you, other days I'll give you a hard time for not building me a house like Noah did for Allie in The Notebook. On those days, I hope you'll remember that my ridiculousness is one of the many reasons why you love me. Some days I'll mope around like something straight off of The Walking Dead with my hair tied up, no makeup on, and a shirt 3 sizes too big. On those days, I hope you'll smile, then lie and tell me you didn't even notice I wasn't all done up. Some days, I may be so mad at Shonda Rhimes that I catch an attitude with you. On those days, I hope you'll rub my back and tell me she had no right to kill McDreamy anyway. Some days I may struggle to love myself, and on those days I hope your love is enough to fill that void.
You'll learn my smile is bright because it's faced its seasons of darkness. I hope you appreciate the beauty of a smile that has overcome pain. You'll see that there is more to me than pretty selfies and funny tweets. I hope you become engulfed in the deep but beautiful ocean that is me. I hope you'll love every paradox that exists inside me. Whenever things get hard, I only hope you'll love me harder. Nothing about me is easy, but everything about me is worthy. I am passionate, I am eager, I have a smart mouth, I won't hesitate to let you know when you're wrong. I get my stubbornness from my grandmother, my language from my great-grandmother, and my attitude from every single one of my aunts. I'm a handful, a big handful, but I refuse to make myself smaller for anyone.
So whoever you are, wherever you are, I hope you're ready by the time life brings us together. After all, you'll be the one to teach me what real love is - and you'll be stuck with me...
