We all have that one boy who let us love him.

For that I wanted to say thank you.

I know it's strange, to say thank you to a boy who ended up breaking your heart. But, you can't break something that was never whole in the first place.

Let me start from the beginning, so I don't sound so strange. I met a boy, we will call him Conner, well Conner was wonderful. We met at an Escape the Fate concert; we spent more time talking outside then we did inside the concert venue watching the band we paid money too see. I guess that's what happens when you just click with someone in that way. Towards the end of the night he asked for my phone to enter his number, I happily handed it over.

We started talking almost everyday, cracking jokes, flirting, making plans to see one another. He lived an hour away, so we had to plan a week in advance, but whenever the day came he wouldn't talk to me all day so he was basically avoided me. But, I was clouded by lust... or love... who knows. He helped me through a lot during the time and little did he know. I was catching feelings for him, even though he kept blowing me off.

So time goes by, me and Conner slowly stop talking; I would have to text him first to even get a response. Well, one day Conner tells me he took 12 sleeping pills; I have a horrible sense of humor. So, naturally, I told him to do a back flip into a noose; I was so fed up with his lies and stories.

When he finally told me why he stopped talking to me, sure I was crushed, but I also was happy. He told me the reason he was so distant, he gave me closure. Even though Conner was falling in love with his coworker he was allowed to be happy. I gave myself time to think over the past couple months and really.. reflect on what happened. He let me love him for who he was, I always had a big heart; I care too much and I was so used to getting crushed in the end, I thought "this is going to hurt" and I was not wrong.

It hurt so freaking much. But, it was a blessing in disguise. Conner made me realize, 3 things: one, never meet people at concert venues and not think they want an actual relationship; two, he gave me time to myself to think and actually fall out of feeling with him; and three he gave me a chance to be free.

So the silver lining of this whole situation, be patient; don't rush into anything. Feelings are so fragile you can fall in them for a same reason and you can fall out because of that same reason. Be careful, some guys are wolves in sheep clothing.

Thank you Conner, you made me feel something I thought I would never feel again, hope.