Another summer is approaching and with it my twentieth birthday. Being the eternal dramatic, I can't help but think back and reflect on how far I've come as well as what is still to come. I haven't even finished my second year of college yet but high school seems like a life time ago, and graduation seems too far out of my reach. Time is funny like that, but I know it can also pass me by in the blink of an eye. I'm worried of repeating mistakes or letting opportunities pass me by. The future is crazy and beautiful and bright, I only hope that I can keep that in mind. In an effort to remember all I've learned and hold what's important close to my heart, here is something for my future self.
Hey me,
How are you? I hope you're doing well. That has been my constant wish for you: that you are okay and happy and if you are not please get on becoming okay and happy. I hope you are doing something that makes you ready to seize each day and look forward to the next.
Remember to push through and make the best of every situation. I don't know if you're stressed or unhappy, but remember things kinda get worse before they get better, especially in your case. You've been through a lot, but you always seem to make it through. When times get tough, remember the good times: the times you were most happy, the times you've spent with your loved ones, and the times you knew everything would work out.
I hope you have learned to not sweat the small things and realize what is more deserving of your attention. A fatal flaw of yours has always been giving the world more of yourself than you should, and while that is not necessarily bad, I hope you have decided for yourself what is worth keeping around and what is not. There is nothing wrong with giving and expecting nothing in return, but I hope you've mastered the skill of realizing what is more deserving of your energy.
I hope you've stepped out of your shell more and still do the things that make you happy. I hope you're still writing and traveling and eating( sorry can't resist). Try to drown out negativity and make sure that at the end of the day no matter what the world says, be happy with who you are and who you see when you look in the mirror.
If you've been slacking, remember to keep your head up. I hope you've still held onto that childhood dream of taking over the world (not really but really). Call your mom, call your dad, call your friends. Keep in touch with the people who bring out your best self and try to never let them go. Friends have gotten you through a lot of things in the past, and I hope you remember that sometimes it's okay to lean on them and let them be a support system for you. But also remember, that you have remarkable strength within you.
I hope you've stayed humble and down to Earth. Remember where you came from and who helped you get there. Don't be afraid to try good things and don't worry: the best is yet to come.
With love,
Your nineteen year old self
