I met my step dad when I was a small child living with my mom and older sister in our tiny, little hometown in Southern California. We were the three musketeers; my mom, sister, and I. We had a system that was working for us and were incredibly close. When my step dad came into our lives, everything changed. I’m happy to say that we took to each other pretty quickly. I remember being about six years old and begging him to come tell me bedtime stories whenever he dropped off my mom. He always did.
When he asked my mom to marry him I was skeptical. Not because I didn't like him, I've loved my step dad from the start, but the proposal uprooted the sisterhood we had created. We moved from our cozy little home into a much bigger house in a larger town nearby with my soon to be step dad and step brother. At the time, I didn't understand that we were moving into a nicer house in a better neighborhood with a better school system. All I knew was that I was being pulled away from the only home I had ever known and I was bitter.
Every year when Father’s Day rolls around my mom has us go around the table and talk about what the holiday means to us. The first year we all lived together I’m sure I said something along the lines of, “It means we get to eat really good food.” Everyone would chuckle awkwardly as we went around the table struggling to say something polite and appropriate. We weren't a family yet and it would take us a long time to get to where we are today.
When I was seventeen I got into a car accident. I got rear ended in the middle of a highway intersection and I didn't know what to do. My mom was working so my step dad came to the accident site and talked me through exchanging information with the person that hit me and relaying information to the cop that helped pull us out of the middle of the road. In that moment he wasn't my step dad, he was just my parent. It was moments like this, moments where we relied on each other, that made us all a family.
A step dad might not be your father. He might never replace the bond you have with your dad, but that doesn’t make him any less important. Whether he’s the only dad you’ve ever known or a new member of your already established family, a step dad is another person you have in your corner and that is something to cherish. To my step dad I want to say thank you. Thank you for every late night bedtime story and goodbye hug. Thank you for making coffee for me in the morning and for moving me into my college dorm. Thank you for making my mom so happy and most importantly, thank you for giving me a home to come back to. Happy Father’s Day.
