Dear past,
That’s exactly what you are to me now — the past. I think we may have known this for a while now but refused to admit it. The strain it took to continue a conversation. The lack of conversations that we would even have each week. We grew to know less and less about each other’s lives and seemed to care less and less about each other. We vowed it would never happen to us — this fading of a friendship — but I guess all good things come to an end.
Although as much as I want to say all eight years of our friendship were perfect, I think we can both agree they weren’t. We continuously moved on from each other and hung out with different people but denied our friendship was over. We would just come back to each other when things didn’t work out with other friends, almost like a safety net. A friendship should never stand as just something to fall back on.
When high school ended it became a bit more apparent how things were going to work out. Going to different colleges makes you truly see how much effort each person is willing to put in. In the beginning you visited me but as time went on you stopped. You even stopped texting me all together. When all contact was lost, I had assumed you moved on and I did too.
Months later we found our way back to each other like we always had. Nothing could hurt this friendship. We were going to grow old together and share the same room in a nursing home. Wheel chair races down the hallway? We were all for it. Somehow though, that all changed again.
People change over the years and you didn’t like how I was changing. You thought it was for the worst while I thought it was for the better. I guess no one can really give us the right answer but I am positive the right answer wasn’t to pick at my life like you did. You took every insecurity I confided in you about during our eight years of friendship and threw it all in my face. It was uncalled for, unfair and quite frankly unbelievable. I guess you truly don’t know anyone as well as you think you do.
It’s a shame the friendship was over a while ago and we didn’t want to come to terms with it and move on peacefully. I regret it had to end on such a sour note the way it did. On the other hand, I am a bit relieved I now have a solid reason to never rely on the same safety net for so long. If you use it for a while, one day without warning it will break, you will fall through and you will get seriously hurt. Lesson learned, although I wish there was another way. It was fun while it lasted. Too bad it lasted longer than it was fun.
Sincerely, your past
