To My Guardian In Heaven

To My Guardian In Heaven

The earth just isn't the same without you

To My Guardian In Heaven,

I miss you. I miss you more and more every single day and I miss you more than you will ever know. This earth just isn't the same without your presence here. It has lost a beautiful smile, a booming laugh, a witty sense of humor, and a never ending list of other things that the world will never quite have again.

I am so thankful for the time I had on this planet with you. I am thankful for every memory, every moment and every emotion we ever shared together. You taught me so much about how to find love, find strength, find happiness, and most importantly how to find and care for my positive relationships. Without your influence in my life, I would not be half the person that I am today.

It's not going to be easy without you here with me, some days I still think I can call you up on the phone, write you a letter, or go pay you a much needed visit. But then I remember I can't, and I won't be able to ever again, and that's when things get really difficult. That's when the tears start flowing and my heart starts to ache.

I know this is not what you would want though. I know you would want me to smile at the thought of you and laugh at all of our silly times together, and of course I do this, however sometimes are harder than others.

What keeps me going, though, is the sole fact that I know you are always with me in my heart and soul. I know that you are always watching over me from heaven above, continuing to guide me and keep me safe. I keep asking for a sign, a simple sign just so I know you are safe, at peace, and with me. I see butterflies a lot lately, so maybe that's your way of communicating with me.

Regardless, I know in my heart you are okay and that's all that matters. I always wonder if you can hear me when I talk to you. It's just talking through my thoughts, telling you about my day and asking how you are, but I was always wonder, can you hear me? Can you hear the things I say to you, even though it's just in my head? And on a more humorous note, do you see everything I do? Because I don't know if you would be proud of everything I do and I don't know if I would like you to see all of that.

I guess I just don't know how heaven works, but what I do know is that I have gained the most beautiful guardian angel. The single bonus to you finding the light is that I could never be with you constantly here on earth, but now that you're in heaven, you can always be with me.

I love you with all of my heart my angel. I hope you are smiling down on me, proud of the person I am because of everything you have taught me throughout our time together.

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I often hear a lot of people complaining about their step-parents and wondering why they think that they have any authority over them. Although I know that everyone has different situations, I will be the first to admit that I am beyond blessed to have a step dad. Yep, I said it. My life wouldn't be the same that it is not without him in it. Let me tell you why I think step dads are the greatest things since sliced bread.

1. They will do anything for you, literally.

My stepdad has done any and every thing for me. From when I was little until now. He was and still is my go-to. If I was hungry, he would get me food. If something was broken, he would fix it. If I wanted something, he would normally always find a way to get it. He didn't spoil me (just sometimes), but he would make sure that I was always taken care of.

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2. Life lessons.

Yup, the tough one. My stepdad has taught me things that I would have never figured out on my own. He has stood beside me through every mistake. He has been there to pick me up when I am down. My stepdad is like the book of knowledge: crazy hormonal teenage edition. Boy problems? He would probably make me feel better. He just always seemed to know what to say. I think that the most important lesson that I have learned from my stepdad is: to never give up. My stepdad has been through three cycles of leukemia. He is now in remission, yay!! But, I never heard him complain. I never heard him worry and I never saw him feeling sorry for himself. Through you, I found strength.

3. He loved me as his own.

The big one, the one that may seem impossible to some step parents. My stepdad is not actually my stepdad, but rather my dad. I will never have enough words to explain how grateful I am for this man, which is why I am attempting to write this right now. It takes a special kind of human to love another as if they are their own. There had never been times where I didn't think that my dad wouldn't be there for me. It was like I always knew he would be. He introduces me as his daughter, and he is my dad. I wouldn't have it any other way. You were able to show me what family is.

So, dad... thanks. Thanks for being you. Thanks for being awesome. Thanks for being strong. Thanks for loving me. Thanks for loving my mom. Thanks for giving me a wonderful little sister. Thanks for being someone that I can count on. Thanks for being my dad.

I love you!

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A Letter To My Friends When I'm Abroad

To some of the most important people in my life


Dear Friends,

I'm sure you know that studying abroad is a once-in-a-lifetime experience, especially for me. The ability to immerse myself in a different country with different people, culture, and lifestyle will enable me to grow tremendously. And while you know how exciting this can be, it also causes me to feel a lot of confusing emotions. Don't get me wrong, I am ecstatic to study abroad next semester, but as my departure date gets closer and closer, the reality of leaving also sets in. It is starting to hit me that I will be gone for an entire semester. It means that I won't be there for every wonderful thing you will experience in the fall, from movie nights to lunch dates to nights out.

In the next couple of weeks, I will have to exchange some goodbyes "see you later"s with you. And before the summer is over, I will be living in a new place for three and a half months...5,800 miles away. A part of me wonders how I will be able to handle the time and distance apart from you since you are some of the most important people in my life right now. Realistically, it may be difficult to communicate sometimes, but I hope this does not affect anything. I still want to hear about all your crazy stories, including funny stories from class, interesting questions you were asked on a tour, and whatever interesting events are happening on campus. Make sure to keep me in the loop. I hope you never forget that I am always a text away, and I expect to have some quality FaceTime sessions with you, no matter wherever you are in the world.

Although I know you are also upset to not see me for an entire semester, you are constantly supporting me. Just so you know, that support means the absolute world to me. Even though I may feel sad to leave Villanova for a semester, you keep me grounded, reminding me that studying abroad will be an amazing experience. You encourage me to live my best life abroad, and I know you will always be rooting for me despite the oceans that separate us. Just as I will be cheering for you nearly 6,000 miles away, ensuring that you too are living your best life.

Thank you for always believing in me.

With love,


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