Hey there,

This your {f u t u r e} mother and I have come across countless letters from parents either to child(ren) before or after they've entered this world or even advice they wished they had told them sooner but none of them felt right for me to pass on to you.

That's because each parent is different when it comes to their child(ren).

Here's mine just for you.

Let me begin by saying that no matter if you are a female or male, I will love you no matter what. You will always be my pride and joy, my hope is you never forget that.

As your mother, I know there are going to be several times we will butt heads and disagree. I can tell that I will come off as being somewhat overprotective and in your eyes, controlling because I won't let you go to that party after the football game on Friday night or because I refuse to let you date a certain person, not because I don't like them but because I know they aren't the right influence that a significant other should be. Trust me, I've dated a few toads and only want what is best for you.

I vow as your mother to never push you into something that you don't want to do. You don't like or want to play sports? That's fine. You don't want to take up playing an instrument? Totally cool with that. You don't want to attend college right away after graduating from high school? I understand. You don't want to attend prom? Amazing, we can spend the night in, order pizza or Chinese or some chips and salsa have a movie marathon. Heck yes! I don't want you to ever feel like you can't be yourself around me or hide things from me. As weird as it seems, I was your age and went through what you're going to experience.

Don't ever be afraid to open up to me about anything. I'll forever be your confident and won't judge you -- no matter, you have my word as your mother. Granted I don't have to like every single choice you make (do anything illegal and I promise automatic life grounding). At the time, it may seem like your only option or that you have to do it but regardless of what your "friends" say, you don't have to do everything that 'everyone' else is just to fit. To get even more cheesy and quote a line from my favorite movie, and in my own terms, hands-down one of the best movies, "Why fit in when you were born to stand out?" - Ian Wallace, What A Girl Wants (2003).

To my daughter, I want to raise you to be strong, fearless and courageous. I want to raise you with the same beliefs that my father did. To always try to see the best in things even when you doubt it. I want you to discover all sorts of things and never be afraid to explore. Stay curious, my girl. Learn to love others even if they are differently than you. Be a friend to all and when someone is mean, don't use words to hurt but instead move on and find joy elsewhere.

To my son, I hope that you are kind, honest, and respect all, not just your dad and I. I, as well, will raise you with the same beliefs that my father raised me with. I want to help you understand that regardless of what others may see or what you hear/read, it is okay for you to show emotions and to feel things; you don't have to hold up the front of being a strong, tough "bad boy" just to earn respect from your fellow males. If you decide to be a feminist, don't listen to the negative stigma that comes from that term; it is powerful more and not the least bit silly. Be kind to all that you encounter for you do not know of the world and its struggles.

Love,

Your Mom.

p.s. I promise to always tell the story of how your father and I fell in love just to get back at you anytime need be.