To my former best friend,

I know I screwed up. I know that I should have been there for you when you needed me and I wasn’t. I regret it every day. Every day I see your posts on social media and I wish I was still a part of your life, and you a part of mine. Because I miss you.

Every day things happen that a year ago I would have texted you about or told you about. Like Post Malone’s new album. We would have freaked out over it together. I would have come over to your place and we would have listened to it together and talked about which songs were the best.

I know I wasn’t there when you needed me, and that wasn’t fair to you. But at the same time, I had my own shit going on. I was going through a lot with school and was in the process of deciding whether or not to take a semester off of school. I was a mess because of it, and you had your own shit going on so I didn’t expect you to be there for me cause I knew you were a mess too and you were dealing with that.

So why is it that I could accept that for you, but you ended our friendship over it for me? You’ve always said you’re understanding of life and I’ve always found that to be true so why did you cut me off without ever asking me why I wasn’t there for you when you needed me? Did you not know me well enough to know I had a reason? I was in such a dark place that even sending a text asking how you were doing was mentally draining for me. I was a bad friend to everyone at that point, not just you. I lost you though.

I miss you so much. I wish I had been there for you, despite my personal shit. Because then maybe I’d have my best friend in my life still.

So to my former best friend;

I’m sorry.

And I miss you.


The friend who screwed up