Dear Dorm Cafeteria,

I have been home for a little while now, and there is only one thing I have to say to you, and that is I do not miss you. I do not miss you with any ounce of my being. I miss my friends, I miss my campus, heck I even miss my classes sometimes, but I most certainly do NOT miss you.

I do not miss starting my every day eating something that I was not completely sure about what it was cooked in. "Fruit smoothies" were in fact NOT made of fruit, but rather "strawberry flavor mix" poured from a large carton, and this is simply not acceptable. I place my order, and suddenly the food magically appears on my plate and five pounds are added to my body.

My first day home, my dad made chicken for dinner. CHICKEN. He made chicken that does not have a weird color or has been sitting out since noon, as in REAL chicken. We had a variety of vegetables with it as well, instead of dry, cob-less corn. In case you have not noticed, this is what a real, healthy meal looks like. I do not even want to know what kinds of oils your food is soaked in before being nuked in some kind of cooking machine. If there is one thing you have made me grateful for, it is that my parents' cooking is now comparable to that of a five-star restaurant celebrities eat at on a consistent basis.

Another thing I do not miss is the same five options day in and day out. By the end of the year, I was on a strict diet of Bagel Bites and Frosted Mini-Wheats because they were simply the only things available that did not make me want to die. Did I feel healthy? Absolutely not, but I managed to muster about my daily activities with enough energy to not replicate some form of a depressed and dying manatee.

Dorm cafeteria, you managed to make me tired of pizza. Do you realize how much of an accomplishment that is? In the beginning of the year, having a section of our food court with a constant supply of pizza was the greatest thing I could have ever hoped for in a university. After just a couple months, the rubbery pizza slowly began to expose itself for what it really was: cardboard. With one bite, I knew I was not going to be able to go near pizza for quite some time. You managed to turn me against one of the foods I trusted the most, and for that you can never be forgiven.

Now I am certainly not saying EVERYTHING was an atrocity and an insult to the art of food, but after two long semesters, it got a little draining. The only food I managed to never grow tired of were the breakfast sandwiches, which shouldn't be much of a surprise due to their campus-wide fame and shared appreciation. So don't worry cafeteria, you got at least ONE thing right.

So this is goodbye, and it is most definitely my easiest goodbye. The only thing you were ever good for was convenience. I look forward to a life of healthy food and knowledge of the ingredients used. I look forward to a life of energy and options, and most importantly, a life without you.

Best,

Someone who will NOT be renewing their meal plan