Father’s day for the stereotypical American family is a day where you give recognition to your dad, that’s if you have a dad you value. However, my biological dad isn't someone I want to put the time and effort in recognizing, and I know I'm not the only person who is in this situation.
For a long time, Fathers day was just a day where I would appreciate my mom twice as much as I would any other day. Typically my sisters would go spend the day with their dad, and I would spend the day with my mom and step-dad. This isn’t really different than any other time they would go to their dad's for a weekend or for a camping trip. Sometimes I would think to myself “I wonder what it’s like to actually have a dad to spend the day with?” I was clearly oblivious to what was right in front of me.
I can’t tell you how many times I have had to break bad news (dumb things I have done that I shouldn’t have done) to my step-dad, because I didn’t want to have to tell my mom. He’s always fixing my car too, because one of the dumb things I did was run a stop sign when I was 16 and nearly totaled it, resulting in constant car troubles for me now. I don’t think there has ever been a time that we didn’t do something fun for a summer trip, because he always makes sure we do at least one fun thing, even if it’s not a full out vacation. When I was young and started my period, he would go to the store and buy me tampons with absolutely no shame. Whenever I would get migraines, he would hold my hair for me while I puked, which is never pleasant. One time he even drove 45 minutes to college to fix my car that wasn't broken. Needless to say, he is always trying to make sure I'm taken care of and happy.
I’m pretty sure all of the things I just listed are “dad things”. For so long I didn’t see that I’ve always had a male figure in my life that loves and cares about me, I was always hung up on not having a dad. On fathers day, I had the mindset of celebrating my mom, instead of my step dad. But, when I was 17 my last name changed to his and that’s when I realized, “this is my dad”.
I never actually call you dad to your face, but I can tell you that all of my friends at college think you are my dad. I know that I took for granted or didn't give full credit to the relationship I've had with you for years, but as I get older I realize how great of a dad I've had all along.
So with fathers day just around the corner, I hope that a few more people in the same situation that I was in realize that they also have a father worth recognizing this fathers day.
