"Seek the Lord and His strength; seek His face continually." - 1 Chronicles 16:11
"Her comment made me feel like a failure."
This was recently the topic of a conversation that I had with a close friend. I could relate. Oh, how I could relate. There have been so many times in my life that I have felt inadequate. I have questioned God, asking him if he really meant to put me in my current situation. Lord, did you mean to give me three kids? Would my husband not have been better off married to someone else? I go as far as to ask him to make me more like someone else in my life because she just seems to be doing it better.
This actually breaks my heart as I type it because I am certain that it breaks the heart of my Creator when I question him and when I tell him that I am not suited for the life he has blessed me with. I trust him. I believe that he is writing my story. The trouble is that in those moments, I have merely taken my eyes off of him and started looking to the world for my approval and acceptance. When I do this, I will ALWAYS feel like a failure because the world is not where my identity is found. It is found in Christ.
"For we are God's masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good thing he planned for us long ago." - Ephesians 2:10
The enemy knows that if he can take our focus off of God that he can destroy our effectiveness for His Kingdom. It is so easy for us to get caught up in what the world says because it takes effort on our part to root ourselves in Christ and discern his will, but the world shouts at us. It shouts at us from our newsfeeds, in the magazines we read, the television and movies we watch, and in the people we spend our time with. We can become so consumed with the opinions of the world that we forget what our main purpose in this life is. We are here, on this Earth, for one reason and one reason only; to bring glory to the Lord. Isaiah 43:7 says, "Everyone who is called by my name, whom I created for my glory." For His glory. What if I did everything with the mindset of "for His glory?" What would my life look like? What would my parenting look like?
As a Mom, I am constantly feeling pressure from this world to raise successful children. Success measured by if my 3-year-old can sit still at a restaurant for several hours, if my 5-year-old can read yet, what kinds of extracurricular activities they participate in, and my methods of discipline. There is this unbelievable emphasis on how athletic and/or intelligent our children are. We push our children to learn things way beyond their age-appropriate level, we spend countless hours and dollars on sports, and we choose our parenting style and forms of discipline based on the last book we read or how we see other people doing it. We look around us instead of looking up. We will read book after book written by professionals, and forget that there is a book that will answer all of our questions and guide us in every area of our life and decision making.
I just finished doing the Seamless Bible Study by Angie Smith, which I highly recommend. Part of our lesson one week was to read the parable of the the sower and the seed. Verse 22 says, "The seed that fell among the thorns represents those who hear God’s word, but all too quickly the message is crowded out by the worries of this life and the lure of wealth, so no fruit is produced." Tell me this made your heart beat a little harder.
Oh Lord, that I never allow the things of this world to crowd you out of my life.
I have been that Mom that secretly wishes her child was the best one in her gymnastics class. I have sat smugly when my kids were behaving while other children were acting like children. I have been the one who felt embarrassed and as if I had failed when my kids were not the well-behaved ones. I have spent several hours pouring into Emma's lessons for school and worried that I would not be a great teacher. Then the Lord gently reminds me that all of these are things of the earth. Things with which Christ clearly warns me not to be concerned.
"Do not love this world nor the things it offers you, for when you love the world, you do not have the love of the Father in you. For the world offers only a craving for physical pleasure, a craving for everything we see, and pride in our achievements and possessions. These are not from the Father, but are from this world. And this world is fading away, along with everything that people crave. But anyone who does what pleases God will live forever." - 1 John 2:15-17
The truth is these children are ultimately not mine. They belong to the Lord and their purpose is the same as mine, to bring glory to the Lord. He is not concerned with what the lady next to me in line thinks when I discipline my child. His concern is that I discipline my children with love and grace so that they learn how to treat others with the same love and extend grace just as he does for us. The Lord could care less about my kid's GPA or batting average. He only longs for my child to spend time in his word, building his/her relationship with him. He has no concern for where my child goes to college or if he earns a master's degree. He only wants my child to be sensitive to his calling no matter what it may look like. It's simple. My only responsibility is to raise children who love the Lord and passionately seek his face.
"Imitate God, therefore, in everything you do, because you are his dear children." - Ephesians 5:1
If we focus on being imitators of Christ in all that we do, everything else will fall into place. He will fill in the gaps. It won't matter if we receive an ounce of praise in this life because our reward will be greater than earthly praise, for it will be eternal.
