To All The Boys Who've Toyed With My Heart

To All The Boys Who've Toyed With My Heart

You the real MVP.

To all the boys who've toyed with my heart, thank you.

To all the boys who've deemed me worthless after not giving in to sex, thank you.

To all the boys who've failed to see me as the person I truly am, thank you.

Thank you for showing me exactly everything I don't want in my lifelong relationship and all of the red flags I should be weary of going ahead.

Thank you for further proving to me that I certainly do not need a man in my life to be whole, complete and happy. In fact, you've proven to me that I can actually be happier without a man in my life, until I stumble across the one who will treat me with the utmost love and respect.

To all the boys who've toyed with my poor little beaten down heart, here's to you.

Here's to you and your facade, here's to you and your lies, here's to you and your cheats, here's to you and your sly ability to swoop in and confuse the hell out of me, and here's to you for helping me rise above all of the other jerks alike.

There's so many incredible, amazing and loving men out there that would do no wrong to a woman, I, unfortunately, have only had the opportunity to get to know a very slim few, without regards to the wonderful men in my family who are the perfect example of everything I should look for in a significant other.

But because of you all, the not so wonderful boys, I've been able to learn things I never would have learned and become stronger than I ever would have imagined.

You've helped me see that my energy is better spent on doing things I love and enjoy, with people who already love and enjoy my company. You've helped me see that you cannot let your happiness be dependent on another human being because in the end, the only thing you can be certain of is that you will be there for yourself. Finding happiness within yourself is the most crucial part of life, and you've helped me learn that one blow to the heart at a time.

You would think after all of the constant beat downs I've taken, I would have lost faith, but you see, that would be giving you all of the power, and why in the world would I want to give you that?

I haven't lost faith, not at all. I have complete faith that there are beautiful men out there fully capable of loving selflessly just as I know I am capable of doing. You've just helped me see that not every man is fully capable of loving selflessly, and that's okay. You will find your place in the world and so will I.

So to all the boys who feel the need to toy with girls' hearts, I feel sorry for you.

And to all the boys who deem girls worthless if they won't give in to sex, I feel sorry for you.

And lastly, to all the boys who fail to see girls for who they truly are, I feel sorry for you

Because you are creating one hell of an army of kick ass woman who are stronger than they have ever been before and will never take any crap from boys like you again.

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To The Guy Who Treated Me Like Crap

In many ways, I feel bad that you could never see how amazing I am.

Dear (insert guy's name here),

I’m sorry that I acted as your footstool for so long. You treated me terribly, and for some reason, I couldn’t see that. I only saw you as someone who liked me and wanted to be with me (at least, that’s what I thought). I was like a little puppy dog following you around, completely loving and loyal. I was always waiting for you to text me, posting Snapchat stories for the sole purpose of knowing you would see them and always hoping you would come around when I was out with my friends so I could show you off.

No matter how hard I wanted us to work out, I now realize it never would have.

You weren’t right for me because you treated me like I was your inferior. You were always talking to other girls, flirting with them, and treating me like a child. You were so selfish. Only doing what you wanted and coming around when you felt like it and taking advantage of me. You made me feel crazy when I got mad at you for all the little things. I was so caught up in you that I tried to ignore all of the signals right in front of me.

You just weren’t right for me.

I now know that the right guy for me is the one who respects me and chooses me over everyone else. The guy who never makes me feel insane for questioning something, the guy who understands when he’s done something wrong and can live with the consequences. You just simply couldn’t provide that for me. In many ways, I feel bad that you could never see how amazing I am.

While I may have been so upset when our relationship ended, it made me realize who I am and what I deserve. I deserve so much more than someone putting in 50 percent. I deserve an endless amount of respect and communication. Putting in your all for a relationship when they can’t do the same is not healthy and it’s childish. I hope someday you can find a girl that you can love infinitely but I take a lot of pride in knowing that girl won’t be me. I may be single for a really long time or I may find the one tomorrow, either way, I have so much hope that one day someone can give me their all and make me feel incredible.

For now, I’m done wasting my time on guys like you who make me feel miserable.

The One Who Got Away

Cover Image Credit: Trinity Kubassek

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Thanks To The Jonas Brothers, I Never Regret Not Dating A Teenage Boy

Ya'll made it drama free.


All thanks to three guys from New Jersey, I never regret not having a boyfriend in Middle or High School. I started listening to the Jonas Brothers when I was in 6th grade. I was awkward, I wanted to fit in simply because I was the minority in my mostly white school district. I also wanted to feel more independent since I was reaching the ripe age of 13.

Eventually, certain things came to me where I was able to gain that independence. I had no problem talking to certain adults simply because I would just be myself, and they would have absolutely no issue with it. Then came Nick, Kevin, and Joe. They already had one album out called 'It's About Time', and too contrary belief became a classic for them to date. Eventually, as they made their approach to the Disney Channel, their popularity increased more and more. Soon enough, everyone knew of them. Even if they didn't even listen to their music, they still knew about them.

I was what you called the stereotypical 'fangirl.' I was overly protective of them whenever I would hear any guy in school call them 'gay' 'ugly' or 'untalented'. In fact, I'm very thankful that social media was not as big yet. I could not imagine going off as much as I would imagine. But there were other ways to vent. I still had some of my friends relate, but even with that, a good portion of them would tell me to stop being obsessed with them. But that only allowed my obsession to grow.

Everything that they did was a news update for me. I had to keep up with them ALL the time, no matter what the condition was. I had to know what they were doing every single day. Okay, not to a point of stalking but you get the picture. My point is that no other boy mattered at the time other than them. Joe was my favorite one so I had to keep up with him the most. Especially when he was dating someone. Yes, I will admit that some of Joe's exes were not my favorite, yet I shipped the hell out of the other ones. But I will say now that as a grown woman I am no longer interfering with his relationship. I was always wondering what it would be like to even go on a date around that age.

I never went on one considering how weird teenage boys truly are. Some of them want a girlfriend simply just to have one, and others just had their hormones go all nuts. The reason why I wasn't heavy on dating during that time was simply that I was trying to focus on myself and who I truly was. I did not want to deal with any of the drama that came with a relationship because I had a lot more than I needed to worry about.

Yes, did I want a guy that I thought was hot to date me of course! But it turns out looking back on it, I'm grateful that I decided to not give him the time of day. Considering that nowadays he's not exactly the right person to be with anyway. Even in general, I'm glad I never had to worry about fighting with another girl about another guy. A total complete waste of time, and not worth sacrificing anything.

I realized that there was so much more to life than just having a guy like you. Even if you did get those weird feelings every time he was around. Also if it was the other way around where a guy liked you, and you just didn't like him back. What a complicated web the teenage years hold. But back to the Jo-Bros. I'm grateful that these guys were in my life because it distracted me from the realities of how teenage boys truly are. You know, the ones that don't sing to you and tell you-you're beautiful every five seconds.

I'm grateful for all the memories that I had with these guys, especially making endless books and PowerPoint presentations on why I loved them so much. Although I'll still keep up with them once in a blue moon, it doesn't mean that I'll forget my first love. Just because I'm not in a room where they've plastered all over the walls anymore, doesn't mean that I didn't cherish those times when I would beg my mom to get me the latest teen magazine. If they were not in it, I didn't want it! Plain and simple everyone remembers their first teen crush. But I'm grateful that these three brothers allowed me to not get distracted by the teen dating scene. Also, I think it helped out my father as well.

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