To All My Fellow People Pleasers

To All My Fellow People Pleasers

It's time to make a change.
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I've spent almost all of my 18 years putting others' happiness before my own. Whether it was instilled in me out of the womb, or due to my social anxiety, I have always valued the opinion of others greater than my own. I never recognized this flaw until now, and never truly considered it a flaw. I'm not here to brag about being a "giving person" who has a "heart too big for this world". I just simply spend more time making sure that my friends and family and those close to me are satisfied before I consider how I personally feel.

I can distinctly remember compromising my own beliefs and acting entirely out of character at a young age to try and please those around me. I would throw away my own opinion as to not step on the toes of an outspoken friend. I'd always make sure I was doing good in school so my parents could be proud of me and never wanted to be a "problem child". If someone was talking poorly of another I would agree just to avoid confrontation, which only created more confrontation. I would so often apologize for things I realize now needed no apology for.

We all learn new things when placed in a new environment or sometimes just have an instantaneous moment of realization. After being pent up in my house for a few days after a tonsillectomy and being in somewhat of isolation, I had my realization. I am entirely capable of making myself happy. I don't need to spend time going out of my away to appease others to make sure I am happy. I can be happy all on my own.

This was something I never truly knew I could do until this year. After my first year of college, a lot has changed. I have changed. Friendships have changed. My life has changed. Change used to scare the heck out of me, but now I embrace it with open arms. I'm done spending every day anxious about what I might have done wrong to ruin a friendship or upset someone else. That's changed.

Life is way too short to spend your own valuable time trying to consistently reach out to people and make sure they know they're valued when they don't reciprocate the same value for your friendship. If someone doesn't want to be in your life, let them leave. Don't hang on to loose ends and what ifs and broken promises and false affections. Stop consuming yourself with the opinion of others and harboring on negative energy. It's time to prioritize yourself, weird concept I know.

One of the biggest changes I've made just this past week is spending an hour a day without my phone. I hide it from myself somewhere I won't remember, which makes looking for it interesting. This helps me stay off of social media which helps keep my mind off of seeing things that will send my mind into a downward spiral of "why wasn't I invited?" "what did I wrong?" "do I need to reach out and be a better friend?" The answer to all of those is a no.

I found a quote when scrolling through Pinterest one day and it has repeated in my mind ever since. "Invest in the people who invest in you." This simply means be the truest, best version of you for the people who show they care for you. The ones who reach out to you on a bad day. The ones who will send a random text even if you haven't talked in weeks just to remind you they're there. The ones who show a valiant effort to help make you a better person. The true friends in your life.

So to all my fellow people pleasers out there, STOP.

It's time to focus on making someone else happy, YOU.

Cover Image Credit: Now Here This

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5 Perks Of Having A Long-Distance Best Friend

The best kind of long-distance relationship.
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Sometimes, people get annoyed when girls refer to multiple people as their "best friend," but they don't understand. We have different types of best friends. There's the going out together best friend, the see each other everyday best friend and the constant, low maintenance best friend.

While I'm lucky enough to have two out of the three at the same school as me, my "low maintenance" best friend goes to college six hours from Baton Rouge.

This type of friend is special because no matter how long you go without talking or seeing each other, you're always insanely close. Even though I miss her daily, having a long-distance best friend has its perks. Here are just a few of them...

1. Getting to see each other is a special event.

Sometimes when you see someone all the time, you take that person and their friendship for granted. When you don't get to see one of your favorite people very often, the times when you're together are truly appreciated.

2. You always have someone to give unbiased advice.

This person knows you best, but they probably don't know the people you're telling them about, so they can give you better advice than anyone else.

3. You always have someone to text and FaceTime.

While there may be hundreds of miles between you, they're also just a phone call away. You know they'll always be there for you even when they can't physically be there.

4. You can plan fun trips to visit each other.

When you can visit each other, you get to meet the people you've heard so much about and experience all the places they love. You get to have your own college experience and, sometimes, theirs, too.

5. You know they will always be a part of your life.

If you can survive going to school in different states, you've both proven that your friendship will last forever. You both care enough to make time for the other in the midst of exams, social events, and homework.

The long-distance best friend is a forever friend. While I wish I could see mine more, I wouldn't trade her for anything.

Cover Image Credit: Just For Laughs-Chicago

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Treat Yo' Self To These 13 Self-Care Products Because You're Worth The Splurge

If you're going to splurge on something, splurge on yourself.

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After a long week of work or class, we could all use a good self-care night to relax our worries away.

I'm just as broke as the next college student, but I rationalize splurging on these 13 self-care products because they're just that good.

1. Lush bath bombs

Lush Bath Bomb

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I know I just named the most expensive bath bomb brand ever, but if you've used a Lush bath bomb you know it beats out all the competition.

Lush's bath bombs will take your classic self-care bath to a whole new level with the gorgeous colors and irresistible scents!

2. Lush ocean salt 

Lush ocean salt

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While you're at Lush picking up your bath bombs, be sure to grab the best face and body scrub on the market that will clarify and cleanse all skin types.

It smells amazing and it works wonders on your skin.

3. Clarisonic 

Clarisonic

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Speaking of exfoliating, the Clarisonic is gentle enough to use everyday and leaves your face clean and polished.

The Clarisonic has different brush heads so it's perfect for every skin type and cleans your face so much better than washing your face with your hands would!

4. An electric toothbrush 

Clearly I believe conventional ways of doing things just aren't cutting it anymore.

After using my electric toothbrush I could never go back!

There are so many different electric toothbrushes out there ranging in prices, so do your research if you're interested in getting one and I promise your dentist will thank you.

5. Crest whitestrips 

Crest whitestrips

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Now this one is really a splurge because Crest whitestrips are expensive as hell, but nothing says self-care then whitening away all those coffee stains!

6. Glamglow face masks

Glamglow

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These are another pretty intense splurge for a face mask but Glamglow has without a doubt the best face masks of all time, literally, celebrities use them!

Some of my personal favorites are Supermud and Bubblesheets.

7. The body shop body butter 

The body shop body butter

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These body lotions will leave your skin feeling baby soft and extremely hydrated.

8. Baby foot exfoliation foot peel

Baby foot peel

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Speaking of baby soft... this product is kind of weird but trust me it's amazing.

Basically, you wear these disposable socks on your feet for an hour and a week later all your skin peels off.

It's weird, but your feet end up baby soft.

9. Bath & Body Works 3-Wick Candle 

Bath & Body Works Candle

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What's a self-care night without a candle burning in the background?

Champagne toast and peach bellini are my all-time favorite scents.

10. Flawless-instant and painless facial hair remover 

This will become your newest, best kept secret self-care product!

11. Macadamia deep repair masque

Because we're all more confident when our hair looks good.

12. The wet brush

The Wet Brush

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I'm sure you already own a wet brush, but if you don't what are you doing!

This brush allows you to detangle your hair with over 45% less damage than normal hair brushes.

13. Tan Towel 

Tan Towel

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No sun is required to look beautifully bronzed when you're using tan towel!


Of course, you're most likely not gonna go out and buy all of these extremely expensive items today, but I hope you consider splurging a little on yourself because you deserve it and you're worth it!

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