Besides starting as a freshman in a new school, in a new area, with brand new people, and new classes, college can be a lot to handle and the thought of rushing for a sorority is daunting. There are many stigmas around sororities and some I have found to be true, but the majority I have found to be wildly inaccurate. Granted, I go to a school where Greek life is not necessary to be socially involved so the advice given, while generic, may be different for schools where Greek life is a major part of your life.
1. Be present.
This may seem like a no brainer, but having gone through rush, I can honestly say going through the motions will get you 0 bids. The sisters in the various sororities are looking for a connection beyond talking about what your major is or where you're from. They are judging you, yes they do, to see if you are someone they feel they would be friends with or if another sister would be compatible with you. Yes, it is essentially girl flirting, but you will find people that you just click with likely. However, you will never make a meaningful connection with or impact on a sister if you don't give her the time of day and just seem to be disinterested or distracted.
2. Admit you're nervous.
Admit it to yourself, the girls you talk to, your mom, your friends, anyone. When a sister asks how your first day of rush is going, it's better to be honest and say you're nervous than to say "it's fine." Being nervous shows you care and you're committed to the process and want to impress the sisters. And from the planning workshops my chapter has already been doing for rush for NEXT SPRING, i can guarantee you that the sister's are just as nervous to do a good job wowing you. Most mornings of rush, they will have been up for many more hours than you already setting up and dressing up in their matching, specified outfits.
3. Ask questions.
No one going into rush knows everything. From questions about the sister you're talking to, to questions about the rush process in general, to questions about the Chapter, all of them are welcomed and will show the sister you have put thought into the process and want to make sure you find a sorority that fits you. Most sisters will happily encourage questions because it means they won't have the same conversation for the 11th time that morning.
4. Be open minded.
No one Potential New Member, (PNM) or rushee, knows which sorority they may end up in. I have seen basically every girl I know who had a specific sorority in mind before the first day of rush either not receive a bid or not be asked back for the next day of rush by that sorority. If you refuse to give the other sororities a chance you may miss the best match for you personally even if it isn't a "top-tier" sorority. My mom was a Tri Delt and I'm a KD, and while our sorority experiences are positive and somewhat similar, her chapter of Tri Delt is 1000% different than the one at my school, and her school didn't even have a KD chapter at the time.
5. Dress comfortably.
While each day becomes progressively more formal in attire, you will not be able to stand and focus on having a meaningful conversation with the sister in front of you if you can't feel your feet and are nervous about falling over. You won't win over any sister or gain any bids from being the dressiest in the room; in fact, most sisters see this as a negative because you are 99% of the time never going to look like that and present yourself in that manner, so why would you for rush? Besides having to stand for increasing amount of times each day, you will likely be exhausted after each day and not want to get up excessively early to do an extensive makeup routine or hairdo before rounds start.
6. Look for who you could BECOME friends with, not where your friends are.
Joining a sorority while a social endeavor, you shouldn't be joining a sorority because the friends you already have are joining it. When you find the right sorority, you should feel like most girls you meet could become your friends. It should feel natural to talk to them and you should feel excited and happy every time you enter the rush room. Don;t go chasing the tails of your friends or girls you want to be apart of because they're the "it" girls on campus... 99% of the time they say that about themselves but then you realize that they're just a group of girls made for each other and not you, and that's a-okay.
Rushing for a sorority is definitely nerve-wracking and can cause tears, tension, and headaches, not to mention sleep deprivation and anxiety about the smallest details. Overall, girls will say rush is the worst week of their life but the outcome of eternal sisterhood is well worth it. If you can suffer through the rushing period for your school and follow these tips, you will likely find girls you didn't realize you could get along with so well and find so interesting and encouraging. It is so hard to find a group of solid girls in college that support each other and celebrate the others' victories even in their own defeat. Rushing was the most intense week of my life, but I wouldn't trade my sisters or sorority for anyone in the world.
