Three years ago on a seemingly normal day, my world was turned upside down. I will always remember November 9th 2015 in vivid detail. It was and still is the worst day of my life. That was the day my family and I lost quite possibly the greatest man I have ever known, my papa. I remember everyone saying how sorry they were for our loss. I remember everyone saying he is in a better place. However, the phrase I remember most of all was that in time it will be okay. I can tell you this right now, no amount of time will make the pain of losing someone so important 'okay'. When you lose someone who meant the world to you, time will never ease the hole in your heart where that person once was. The void is always there it just becomes more bearable to live with. Now I want to share three lessons I have learned the past three years.

THERE IS NO TIME LIMIT ON GRIEVING

Grieving is not a set process. It is not going through the stages of grief and then after that the grieving is over. I have personally gone through the stages of grief multiple times. Also you may feel okay for a little while and then suddenly you feel the absence of them. You are not limited to how long you can grieve, it is okay to grieve as long as you need. Do not let anyone tell you differently, everyone will grieve differently.

IT DOESN'T GET EASIER

Hear me out, I'm not saying you will never be happy again. I am saying that the void that is caused by the loss of a loved one is always there. There are many times throughout each year since my grandpa died that I wished he was there for. Every time something huge happens my first instinct is still wanting to tell my papa. Every huge event he is not there for is still hard and has not gotten easier. Holidays are still not the same as they used to be. In the back of my mind I still dread them, because I still think my papa should be here celebrating with us. However, it does become bearable. There will be a new normal to your life without even realizing it at first. You aren't going to be sad forever, you will miss them forever, but you will be able to live your life as normally as you can again.

DON'T TAKE ANYTHING FOR GRANTED

This is the lesson I feel is the most important. When I say don't take anything for granted, I mean do not take anything for granted. Not the little phone calls you have with your grandparents, not when you're sitting with your grandpa and he is watching a news channel you have no interest in, not when your grandparents comes to all of your events; and tell you that they thought you were the best out there (they mean it by the way), not when your grandparents make you a home cooked meal, not even watching football after Thanksgiving, not when your grandpa stays up talking to you for hours, and never take for granted how much they love you. These things may seem little now but believe me it's the little things you remember when you are missing them. Everyone takes things and people for granted without even realizing it. I urge you to try your hardest not to take these things for granted. Take advantage of these things instead. Don't leave anything unsaid or to a what if. Take time to call the people you love and hear their voice, thank them for everything they have done for you. One day you may not have that luxury to do so. So call the people you love while you can and as often as you can.

TO MY PAPA

It does not feel like three years without you, I feel like it was just yesterday when I received my last hug from you. I wish I had cherished it more at the time, I just assumed I would see you in maybe a month or less like always. I never once thought I would see the day that we would have to live without you. You were my hero, in my eyes you seemed invincible. You were also my best friend, I could tell you anything. You always knew what to say, you reminded me I was more than a problem, a grade, and whatever I was worried about at that time. You taught me to see the best in everyone. You taught me generosity and what it was like to have Christ-like love. I miss you everyday still to this day. I hope I make you proud. I will always love you Papa.