Three Lessons About Being Superficial

Three Lessons About Being Superficial


We all do it.  It’s impossible not to.  

Appearance is the first thing we normally notice when we meet a person. Below, is an eye-opening personal story that should help you realize the importance of putting an end to all negative judgment. 

In August 2013, I was moving into junior year at Kappa and $3,000 worth of my personal belongings got donated to Goodwill without my consent. That was my hard earned cash: saving up to buy shoes, bags, dresses, Lululemon apparel, hair straightener, jackets, jewelry, etc. Also, homemade gifts and accessories from friends and loved ones, as well as a $300 quilt that I sewed myself to bring with me to college. Tossed. All gone. And with these belongings tossed, so was my image.

Since that day, I slowly went from being a classy, somewhat disorganized, busy girl to a needy, selfish, mad-at-the-world-person-all-the-time kind of girl. It has been over a year, and I am still recalling more and more items that I no longer have. I still find it hard to let it go. I am thankful for the few, true friends, who stepped up and let me borrow a towel, a curling iron and even gave me some nice hand me downs. But for those who only see me, these days, in my seventh grade rain slicker and yoga pants that don’t make it past my ankles, at least now you know what I’ve been through. Maybe, you will be less likely to judge.               

I do miss feeling put together and beautiful. Image is important!  And as the fall whether comes, I start to cry a little stepping outside, remembering the faux-leather jacket my mom sent me for my birthday, freshman year that I wish I could wear again.

I miss living up to being that fun-loving, sorority girl, who has new beautiful things, and who doesn’t have a care in the world. But as with every mistake or mishap, we create a learning experience. Below are three things I learned about being superficial.

1. Looks aren’t everything! Stop the judgment. One take away that I got from this experience, is realizing how superficial I used to be. I am even more grateful for all that I do have. I have a much deeper appreciation for people, for who they are and their uniqueness. I find it disgusting how people go out of their way to mess with their hair color, go on crazy crash diets, and even buy expensive shoes, just to live up to some image they have when they are a beautiful person just the way they are. Superficial treatments or possessions won’t make you better than anybody else.

2. People’s opinions of you change, but your opinion of yourself doesn’t. People who see me at all the jobs I work might describe me as, happy, busy, and dedicated. People, who see me in class, might consider me as needy and not put together. While both may be true, neither matter. I’ve realized that I can’t please everybody. Trust me, it’s actually impossible. Everyone has a different opinion. What I can do is change my opinion of myself. If I think well of myself, and that is all that really matters.

3. The importance of a kind gesture. People might seem confident and secure on the outside, but on the inside they could be fragile; might break down and cry at any instant. There are lots of stories I could tell you to paint a better picture of why I am the way that I am. People go through a lot, and what is amazing is that we all keep going. Never underestimate the power of a hello, a random text or phone call or wishing someone a good day. Deep down, you never know what kind of battle that person is fighting, and your small gesture -- whether a hug or a smile -- could make all the difference in the world.   

Much love. Quit starting rumors, and get to know me.  xoxo

Cover Image Credit: Copyright: <a href=''>icetray / 123RF Stock Photo</a>

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17 Empowering Bible Verses For Women

You go, girl.

We all have those days where we let the negative thoughts that we're "not good enough," "not pretty enough" or "not smart enough" invade our minds. It's easy to lose hope in these situations and to feel like it would be easier to just give up. However, the Bible reminds us that these things that we tell ourselves are not true and it gives us the affirmations that we need. Let these verses give you the power and motivation that you're lacking.

1. Proverbs 31:25

"She is clothed with strength and dignity and she laughs without fear of the future."

2. Psalm 46:5

"God is within her, she will not fall."

3. Luke 1:45

"Blessed is she who believed that the Lord would fulfill His promises to her."

4. Proverbs 31:17

"She is energetic and strong, a hard worker."

5. Psalm 28:7

"The Lord is my strength and my shield."

6. Proverbs 11:16

"A gracious woman gains respect, but ruthless men gain only wealth."

7. Joshua 1:9

"Be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go."

8. Proverbs 31:30

"Charm is deceptive, and beauty does not last; but a woman who fears the Lord will be greatly praised."

9. 1 Corinthians 15:10

"By the grace of God, I am what I am."

10. Proverbs 31:26

"When she speaks, her words are wise, and she gives instructions with kindness."

11. Psalm 139:14

"I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made."

12. 1 Peter 3:3-4

"Don't be concerned about the outward beauty of fancy hairstyles, expensive jewelry, or beautiful clothes. You should clothe yourselves instead with the beauty that comes from within, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious to God."

13. Colossians 2:10

"And in Christ you have been brought to fullness."

14. 2 Timothy 1:7

"For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline."

15. Jeremiah 29:11

"'For I know the plans I have for you,' says the Lord. 'They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.'"

16. Exodus 14:14

"The Lord himself will fight for you. Just stay calm."

17. Song of Songs 4:7

"You are altogether beautiful, my darling, beautiful in every way."

Next time you're feeling discouraged or weak, come back to these verses and use them to give you the strength and power that you need to conquer your battles.

Cover Image Credit: Julia Waterbury

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There Is No 'Right Way' To React To A Shooting

Everyone is different.


After the shootings this year in New Zealand, Brazil, and close to home for some of us Aurora, people have been reacting in different ways. With some offering their thoughts and prayers, donating money to help pay for the funerals of the victims, fighting for action in regards to ending gun violence, candlelight vigils basically anything that can help them in this time of grief.

There is no right or wrong way to react to a shooting — everyone grieves in their own ways. We should not judge one another for how we grieve in a tragedy.

People have been saying that thoughts and prayers won't do anything. However, maybe it can be a comfort to some people—a way to let people know that they are thinking of them and that they care.

Sometimes people may want to donate money or blood to help out any survivors who may have suffered from blood loss or create GoFundMe accounts to either help out with medical expenses or to pay for the funerals of the victims or even start charities like Islamic Relief USA. Donating your time and money is a good way to help out because you are making a difference that is a form of action you are taking.

There is also grieving in the form of vigils. One example of a vigil is this guy who makes crosses every time there is some kind of tragedy. Vigils are often a good way to remember the victims, to pray for the healing of the survivors, to talk about what they were like as people.

Some people even want to take action by demanding that the laws change a good example of this would be March for Our Lives, which happened after the Parkland shooting last year. This march was fighting for gun control or should I say changes in the gun laws America currently has.

Some people also do acts of solidarity, for example, wearing a hijab like the prime minister of New Zealand did when she went to go visit the Christchurch shooting survivors. My community college had something a couple of years ago called Hijab Day to help show solidarity with our friends. I participated, and it was quite an experience—no one should ever be afraid to be who they are.

There is never a right or wrong way to react, and no one should ever criticize one another for how they react. It's not a test where there is a right or wrong answer—everyone is different and that is okay.

No one should ever have to be afraid to go to school, go to work, or go to their place of worship or wherever they decide to go. Whatever we decide to do to make a change, as long as we are taking some kind of action, is good enough for me.

Nothing ever gets done by sitting around and doing nothing, so whatever it is you do, get out there and do it. As long as you are showing support it doesn't matter how you show it.

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