Three. Everything is better in threes. It’s a lucky number, and I could peg me as a lucky girl to have three best friends. People always see life in black and white, and before they take the time to understand how the world works, many probably think it’s crazy talk having more than one best friend. Is that even allowed?
Best friends hold that special category in our lives. I mean, come on. They didn’t earn the honor of ‘best’ for nothing. Three special people have earned the title with their love, effort, hardships, companionships, and affection throughout my life. We’ve made an eternal investment and our memories are irreplaceable.
The crazy thing about it is: we’re all so different. We all hold different aspirations, goals, dreams, and wants. Yet, every time we’re together, it’s like we’re all on the same page. In regards to our differences, there’s always been an old saying, “opposites attract.”
Whether it be with friendships or significant others, I don’t believe this statement at all. I believe that people can complement each other and that’s exactly what my best friendships are. The three individuals who I love so dearly complement me.
Through communication, we each recognize the individual qualities we possess that contribute to our relationship in a strong, but unfamiliar way. Ironically, our dissimilarities bring us closer together, and bring such a hilarious contribution to our countless reminiscent moments.
K, J, and C make up the most unusual best friend group, in my opinion, because they display such contrasting personalities. Who would’ve known that we would end up together for this long? This opens up our friendship and the rest of our lives to a whole word of possibilities, excitement, and entertainment.
With this ode to my three best friends, I want to highlight how valuable it is to have friends that aren’t exactly like you and how it’s okay to have more than one best friend.
We balance each other out.
We all have an entirely different set of skills and traits. Our characteristics just play off each other and it just works.
K has really developed social skills and can make friends everywhere she goes. The life of every party, she’s not afraid to show her charming personality. She loves to explore and try new things as I consider her the daredevil of the group. A used-to-be tomboy, she can go hard in the paint, but transition into a girly-girl in a flash. She loves taking risks, but it usually works out in her favor. She hates change at times, but she’s really good at going with the flow. K holds this natural artistic ability, and when she gets her creative juices flowing, she never ceases to amaze me (she can sing, dance, draw, paint, what more can you want?) We can literally laugh for hours at a time at stupid nonsense, and we bond through our favorite subject: food. She is one I can truly connect to because we have the same sense of humor and way of thinking. It’s pretty cool because we have this uncanny ability to speak without actually speaking.
C, on the other hand, is very intellectual and objective. She’s so organized, follows instructions and rules like a boss, and is brutally honest and blunt. I love it because she isn’t afraid to tell it like it is. She is an extremely loyal and faithful friend, and even though our physical distance has kept us from seeing each other often, we naturally pick up where we left off. She could care less of what people actually think of her because she is her hardest critic. I admire her self-sufficiency because she’s proved to me and everyone else that she is truly capable of taking care of herself. She's experienced so much in life that it seems "adulting" would be an easy thing for her. I admire her taste for adventure, like snorkeling in a midst of a storm, swimming in volcanoes, or snowboard in Colorado. I just don't quite understand how she can do all these crazy recreational activities, but hold irrational fears in just about everything. I still love her though. She also has an undying love for her horse, and that’s pretty great—even though horses freak me out.
Finally, there's J. She is my oldest friendship. We met in kindergarten and we’ve been inseparable ever since. With a very passive personality, she has always had her head on straight. Although I’ve had my lapses of judgment when growing up, she has always been a constant variable in my life. She’s quirky and spunky, and has an incredible sense of style. J is the only one that has never strayed away from her goals. She’s always been a nerd from grade school to now, but is always humble of her efforts and accomplishments. I absolutely love that we can talk for hours at a time, and even though we don’t see each other as often because "adulting" is taking over, we still have so much to talk about. I know she’ll always listen to every word and knows the perfect things to say. (She's also going to be the best speech-language pathologist there is, just a heads up for all of you out there.)
They’re all so diverse, but having all different personalities and backgrounds gives me the best of all worlds.
We grow up together, near or far.
When we’re together, we make so many ordinary moments extraordinary. All four of us have distinct characteristics, but it makes our dynamic incredibly interesting.
Becoming friends with each one of them in grade school, we were able to experience life together. We had play dates involving eight hours of playing Sims, sleepovers with forts made of blankets, and days where we sat by the pool and ate toasted peanut butter sandwiches. We’ve gone into the “woods” where we went looking for trouble and hoped to find some adventure, but all we did was walk around and get some mud on our shoes. That’s all we needed. Time together. Time to grow up.
We’ve been through too much, even sharing the exhilarating (yet sometimes painful) memories of growing up. At the end of the day, sharing our coming-of-age experiences have been invaluable and are an essential part to our lifelong friendships.
Today, we have plenty of outside friends from our different universities, clubs, and extracurriculars. We bring things in our friendship we’ve learned from others, but we have an understanding that nobody comes remotely close to the friendships we have.
We’re always complementary, never competition.
Our four-way relationship is about nurturing each other, and helping each other grow as a person. We work with one another, not against each other. When one of us succeeds, we don’t respond with any form of resentment, but with words of congratulation. We have enough critics in our life, and we look to each other for encouragement
Of course, it’s not only with accomplishments, but also with everyday life that I find this aspect of our friendship valuable. There are moments when one of us may be more academically prepared for their future occupation or one who is more socially accepted in a friend group. We don’t take these moments and respond to the person with envy or bitterness. I am legitimately happy for my best friends, and sad when things don’t go as planned. Whatever obstacle they are going through in life, it’s my duty to make it my obstacle too. Don’t ever look for someone who will solve your problems; look for someone who will face them with you.
My weaknesses are their strengths (and vice versa).
I learn from them everyday, and with my flaws and baggage, they accept all my faults.
My weaknesses: I am a logical thinker, a know-it-all, socially awkward, but seek for social acceptance. I am stubborn, self-conscious, and I have an extreme lack of common sense. It’s pretty hilarious sometimes.
Their strengths: They challenge me and bring ideas to the table that I never would’ve even considered. When I’m around them, I don’t feel the need to be socially accepted and they embrace my individuality more than anyone ever could. They’ve taught me pride is not a good personality trait, and everyone is self-conscious at times, including them. Lastly, they’ve shown me that lack of common sense is actually a pretty common thing. (You know you’ve had your moments.)
We improve each other and are pushed out of our comfort zones.
When you have contrasting personalities, you will be faced with different perspectives and approaches to issues. K, J, and C have always been supportive in their own ways, but sometimes they each tell me things I want to hear and things I don’t. They each have an outside viewpoint on problems that I face, and while I don’t always love their suggestions, most of the time they’re right.
Thank you for always telling me the truth. Being honest might not always get someone a lot of friends, but it is how I know I’ve chosen the right ones. Too many people nowadays prefer gentle white lies instead of hearing the truth. The three amigos have no limits to telling me I’ve made a mistake, because in the end, it’s better to be hurt by the truth than comforted by a lie.
With all the problems in the world, it’s easy to talk about each other instead of talking to each other. But, our friendships are all about building each other up, making each other better, and helping each other feel more confident.
K, J, and C, this one’s for you.
Thank you for always giving me the extra push I need and inspiring me to be a better person, and for teaching me the value of team-work through the whole-hearted commitment of making this friendship work. Thank you for making the extra effort to understand me with patience, and for not holding my unchangeable past against me. Finally, thank you for not assuming this relationship was always going to be easy because it shows that you believed this friendship was worth working for.
