Being a first-generation college student is a daunting position to be in. We lack the valuable parental insights our peers take for granted. Luckily, with just the right amount of motivation, moxie, and supportive family, facing college and the accompanying lifestyle can be far less intimidating.
What the heck am I doing?
Ah, yes. This ever-too-present thought that rushes the mind of high school seniors as they begin researching potential schools. As a first gen, this thought was quite palpable to me as I pondered which schools to apply to. What should I look for in a school? What will dorm life be like? Will I be able to easily adjust to being away from home? These thoughts, along with many more, plagued my mind as I began my search.
Will mom and dad approve of my choice?
My parents’ opinions mattered (and still do) so much to me. They had given so much of their lives and devoted so many resources to making sure I have a successful future. I felt that I owed it to them to make a good choice of a college. All they wanted was to see me be happy with my life. Although they told me not too (sorry guys), I still considered their opinions when I was applying to schools. I understood that they wanted me to have it better than they did. Their help and their guidance were invaluable to me. While they could not give me collegiate insight, they stuck by me and gave me support. When I got accepted to Notre Dame, I think they were happier than I was, if only by a little bit.
Now what?
Okay, I have my acceptance letter. Now what? I was faced with something almost as daunting as the application process: financial aid and all of the dreaded…. forms. *cringe* Since I was the first in my family to go to college, this process was new to my parents and me. I have to say that with enough coffee, internet tabs, and strong will, the waves and waves of forms can be conquered. Even though we all had some new gray hairs, my parents and I made it through.
Now what? (Revisited)
Coming to campus in the fall was a bit overwhelming, to say the least. My parents and I loaded up in our truck and made the 9-hour trip north to campus. We stayed together and we explored and discovered things together. We shared the wide-eyed experiences and the neat little details of campus. This place was new for all of us. Together, we tried to make sense of the 10,000 activities and events planned during a welcome weekend. As I experienced my first ever dorm move-in, so did my parents. I have to say that I valued the experience of mutual discovery very much. Getting to encounter college the first time with your parents is a wonderful thing that not everyone gets to enjoy.
Hating goodbyes
Of course there comes the goodbyes. I saw everyone in my dorm bidding their farewells and saying their goodbye’s. In a school like Notre Dame where most of the students are not first generation students, most of the families are used to these situations—these final moments before either leaving their child behind or being left alone. As for me and my family, this was new. Because my parents didn’t attend universities or see any of their children off prior to me, I’m sure there were uncertainties and doubts swimming through their minds. Similarly, I had no advice from siblings or other family members from which I could draw bravery. I’m proud of my parents and myself for doing what was necessary to say our goodbye’s and maintain our emotions.
Yes, there are challenges that come with being a first generation college student. Above all, it’s an experience that I grew a lot from. I shared a lot of great experiences and feelings with people I love. In retrospect, I wouldn’t trade it for anything.
