The “real” world. There is no phrase that will make us college students cringe more. We’ve all heard the horror stories. We’ve all thought about life *insert sniffle* after college. But what exactly is it that makes us college students so fearful of the unknown? Or perhaps it is what we do know. Nonetheless, it’s no secret that we have a very strong opinion when it comes to the dreadful term. Here are just a few thoughts on the “real” world that send chills down every college student's spine.
1. Having a 9:00-5:00 job
Long hours behind a desk? No thank you. I can barely focus in the library for three hours, let alone take on an eight hour day five days a week.
2. AKA, getting paid to do coffee runs
Started at the bottom... and we're left to go on endless coffee runs. Good thing we have that thing called a degree.
3. No more basement parties
The glory days of cement floors and walls coated with alcoholic beverages are gone.
4. And no more immature jokes
Penis. Boobs. There's nothing like immature jokes. Of course, that nonsense can't take place once you're in the "real" world.
5. Or any jokes for that matter
Who needs to laugh anyways? Not people in the "real" world.
6. Bills
Ah, yes. No more parents to help out with phone bills. Or cable. Or internet. Or groceries or printer ink or clothes or anything.
7. And student loans
And you thought you were poor during college. I don't know who would sign up for this (oh wait, I did).
8. Real bosses
There's no room for mess ups. This isn't your retail or restaurant job where you can afford to make a few mistakes.
9. No more curves or extra credit
There are no second chances in the "real" world. You can do your best, but make sure your best is perfect.
10. Making your own doctor’s appointments
Mom and dad won't be around to call for you anymore, and if that's not reason enough to want out of the "real" world, I don't know what is.
11. Not seeing your friends all the time
No more walking to class or grabbing food or even living together because you'll be too busy "adult-ing."
12. Goodbye, hot bod
Not that having a hot bod was a thing to begin with, but there will be no more time to potentially hit the gym — and let's not even start with the stress eating.
13. Wrinkles
Goodbye, youth. Goodbye, smooth skin. Might as well throw out your mirrors now.
14. Grey hair
Not the trendy, silver locks you always wanted to try. Hello, hair dye.
15. The fear of being forever alone
One by one, all your friends are finding their forever partners, and then there's you. Didn't the universe know you were joking when you said you were going to have 50 cats?
16. Being a "real" person
Enough said. Adult-ing is not an option.
