I wish I knew what it was like to go to college with some of my friends from high school. Of course, everyone says not to do that because then you won't make any new friends, but they couldn't be more than wrong. I see all of my friends who go to school so close to each other strengthening the relationships they already had and forming new equally as great ones.

Some people assume that I decided to go to a college 100 miles away from everybody because I did not want to go to college with the same people I went to high school with. They would be wrong. I chose my college because I thought two and half hours would be the perfect distance from my home. I could go home if I wanted to, but I was not expected home every weekend. I also chose it because of their programs of study. I managed to change my major not once, not twice, but four times before the semester even started, and once when the school year actually did start. I did not drop those previous programs because they were "bad" majors but because they just were not me. But no matter what I picked, I was confident that my school would prepare me for the real world and the career I was planning to have. I also picked my school because the campus is beautiful and centralized, meaning there are not roads separating buildings and nothing is longer than a 10-minute walk away. I do not fear cars walking to class, basically.

But maybe I thought I would be visited more or I would visit them more, not realizing that we would all be terribly busy with homework, sports, work, or seeing our families, which consumes my life way more than expected.

I started my first semester at college like most freshmen do. I was bright-eyed and bushy-tailed and ready to take college on. I dreaded my 8 a.m. class, I joined a few clubs, I joined a sorority, I got a job, I ate everywhere that I could on campus (there are so many options at my school, no kidding), I quickly jumped into a friend group, but I still did not feel comfortable. I worried a lot if I had made the right choice in choosing this college. I wondered if I could move closer to home but realized no school closer offered the expertise on my areas of study than the school I had chosen.

Later, I realized the club I joined, particular to the fourth major I had chosen, was not my cup of tea. The other club was not the best for me either because I expected too much and got disappointed. My 8 a.m. ended up being the worst class ever in the history of everything (really, nutrition, I do not need you and I do not care about you). The job I had was not what I expected either, but to be fair, it was not all bad. Most importantly, I dropped sorority because I missed home so much. Once I realized that I had to commit a lot of time to one group when I had homework, work, clubs, my boyfriend, and home visits to worry about, I was thinking, "Oh no, I am so not doing this," and left. That was a huge mistake, and I was so embarrassed about the real reason for leaving sorority that I made up all of these stupid reasons for doing so, which made me feel worse. After dropping sorority, I noticed I could have left a massive support system for how I felt.

After a couple of months, I was forcing myself to be happier. I was the only one from my high school class to come to this school -- only two others from my high school came here and I rarely saw them. When I did, though, it made me smile because it was like little pieces of home were following me around. Other than those rare occasions, I felt very alone. I know that I was not alone, physically, but I felt it emotionally and mentally.

I am not the type of person who lets go easily, but that is what I had to do in order to become comfortable giving my "full friendship potential" to these new people who had only known me for two months. I could not let go of my hometown, my lifelong friends, or who I really was. Sometimes I felt like I had to change in college to fit in, which is weird because you only hear of that in high school.

I felt like I was the only one missing home and missing high school. I felt lame for doing so, but once I realized it was okay to let go but still love it, I realized it was OK to give in too.

I never changed myself completely, but I did allow myself to be more open to these new people. It is never easy to adjust to a totally new way of life after literally knowing the same people and doing the same things for 18 years, and I learned that the hard way. I should have gone easy on myself and the other people here, because now they are some of the greatest people I have ever met. Coming back from Thanksgiving break I found myself happier than I had been the entire semester. I got closer with some girls on my floor and found roommates for my sophomore year!

I am enjoying college way more this second semester. I still visit home a lot and miss high school sometimes, but I realized that that was OK. This isn't a "pity me" article; this is just to those who felt like I did to know that it's OK and it gets better if they let it get better.

Enjoy college, it goes by really fast and I cannot believe I am over halfway done with my first year. I'm actually thankful for my first semester, because it will help me appreciate everything thereafter.