As I’m sitting here, perched in front of the TV that is tuned to some channel that I’m completely oblivious to, drinking a glass of wine when I should be cleaning, I couldn’t help but take a minute to write this article.
You see, today is my baby brother’s 18th birthday. He is officially an adult; and to be perfectly honest, it’s hitting me harder than I ever expected it to. When I think about my brother, I consistently picture him as the curly haired, energetic, wild child that would never leave me alone. Over the years, we’ve both grown, and in turn, we’ve grown apart. He’s no longer that little, obnoxious, wild child. Now, he’s this tall, talented, brilliant man. And while there are some things that can only be taught through experience, I’m hoping this article will enlighten him, and other brothers who have older sisters, of a few things I’ve learned through my own experience over the years.
1. To Me, You Will Always Be My Baby Brother.
Yes, I know that you will grow up. And yes, you have grown to be almost a full foot taller than me. But, what you have to understand is that I will always remember being in the hospital waiting room, desperate to finally meet you. I will always remember holding you for the first time, and to a certain extent, resenting you for all of the attention you got. I was the first person to make you laugh, and I was there when you got your first haircut, took your first steps. I went to “Big Kids Day” at your preschool. I was there for your fifth-grade graduation. And no matter how old you get, those memories will always be some of the fondest memories in my life. So, as your big sister, I know that you will grow up, but to me, you will always be the baby brother, and I will forever be your “Sissy”, as long as you need me.
2. We Will Always Fight, But I Will Always Fight For You, Above Anything Else.
There was a hole in the wall that connected our two closets. When we were younger, any time one of us got mad or one of our parents made us upset or punished us, we both used our respective closets as our spot to hide away from the world. When I saw that you were upset, I remember running to my closet, knowing you wouldn’t want me to see you cry, and sitting there until you had stopped. I remember yelling at Dad, after he got frustrated with you when he was helping with homework and you didn’t get it, and then spending an hour in that closet, doing the only thing I knew how to do. And you knew I was there, even if you didn’t want to admit it. And to this day, if anyone has the nerve to pick on you, I would be the first to beat them until their last breath, or sit on the other side of that closet – whatever you needed from me.
We scratched, clawed, punched, slapped, and pulled a lot of hair (especially mine), but no matter how much I’ve fought with you and sworn that I hated you, I have always loved you and been more defensive of you than of myself. This will never change. You might be bigger and stronger than me now, but you are and always will be, my little brother. And I will fight and scream at you and for you until the very end.
3. It’s Okay To Make Mistakes.
Everyone always says this, and on my end, I took this saying a little too far. But you have seen my mistakes, you have seen me grow from them. And now that you have seen my mistakes, it’s time to make your own. Because if you are too scared to make a mistake, you will never learn that some mistakes are worth making. There are some leaps of faith that are worth taking, even if it means bending a few rules. Don’t be afraid to bend them, sometimes even break them. Don’t go crazy, like I did. But don’t be scared to put yourself out there. You are an amazing person. And sometimes being amazing means that you have to change the rules a little. Just always remember the times you saw me go too far….. don’t go that far.
4. No Girl Will Ever Be Good Enough For You.
But at some point, I’ll have to learn to accept that someone is. Make sure that she is sincerely good, though. Because although no one is good enough for you, my wonderful brother, there are some GENUINELY good girls out there. Find them, and respect them. Don’t let a girl run your life. Don’t let her change you. But be willing to compromise. Be yourself, and accept her. And if she breaks your heart, than just know that I will hunt her down… and if you don’t want me to do that, than I’ll teach you the best ways of putting your heart back together. Most of them include ice cream, and paint ball, and throwing darts at her picture. Trust me, it really does help.
5. Last But Not Least, No One Will Ever Be More Loved (Or Annoyed By) Than You Are.
You will always be the baby of the family. You will always be my little brother, the first person that I ever got to teach things to. You will always be so perfectly YOU. And while you might annoy the crap out of me, you might make me want to scream, and some days we may not be on speaking terms, you are always on my mind. You are always loved. You are always the best friend that I can count on, and the brother that I begged for for 7 years. I will never stop loving you. I will never stop being your big sister.
You are an unbelievably kind and talented person, Broski. You will always be my one and only brother, and my favorite…
Love, always and forever,
Sissy.
