5 Things Domestic Violence Survivors Want You To Know
Start writing a post
Swoon

5 Things Every Domestic Violence Survivor Wants You To Know, But Might Not Want To Tell You

They are more than their past.

67
5 Things Every Domestic Violence Survivor Wants You To Know, But Might Not Want To Tell You

Being a domestic violence survivor is a part of a person's past just as much as how they are raised. It is a part of them, but it does not define them. Here are a few things that a domestic violence survivor wants you to know but might not want to tell you:

1. The abuse was real.

Domestic violence survivors are often judged. They are judged for not leaving soon enough. They are judged for telling the truth. A person who has been in an abusive situation when they finally chose to tell the truth does not exaggerate. It is hard enough to tell the truth about what they went through, they do not want to add details. It is embarrassing to admit you were a victim.

2. The love was real.

A normal person falls in love and trusts that the person they love, loves them back. Putting our trust into one person is how we live our lives. It is hard to give up on a person that you have promised to love for the rest of your life, no matter how bad it may seem.

3. Leaving is much harder than it seems.

Threats of the physical and verbal kind are made to a woman to keep her in the house. It can range from physical attacks to having the children kept from her. Most often women in domestic violence situations have been isolated. They do not have anyone to turn to. There is nowhere for them to go.

4. They are aware of their mistakes.

The amount of times people bring up the fact that they made a mistake in the past is overwhelming. The mistakes of the past are in the past. There may be children, which are not a mistake. No matter how bad the past was, it was a part of their lives and it cannot be changed. When you tell someone the way they spent 5-10 years was a mistake it can alienate them.

5. Forgiveness does not mean they'll forget.

A person can forgive the abuser, but it does not mean they have forgotten. It doesn't mean they should accept them back into their life either. When a person says they have forgiven their ex, it is not about their ex. The act of forgiveness is about healing for yourself.

Each domestic violence survivor has their own story to tell. It is different for each person. The one thing each person has in common is they have survived and they have gotten out. They may not be ready to tell their story. They may still be healing, but in time they will get there. Until they do, remember they know where they have been and they don't want to look back.

If you or someone you know is a victim of domestic violence, call the Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE.

Follow Swoon on Instagram.

From Your Site Articles
Report this Content
clock indicates that it is free time

While the idea of free time without a stressful job or an abundance of schoolwork looming over your head may sound like a dream, it can be a nightmare at times. Having a couple of days to decompress is needed for a healthy mind and body. But when too many days go by, it can cause a downward spiral of thoughts and feelings.

As a recent jobless graduate, I was ecstatic to be free from responsibility and take a break from my normal life. That was until I realized just how responsible I had been and needed to be to continue being self-sustained. I learned a few things in this month of unemployment that encouraged me to find a job as soon as possible.

Keep Reading...Show less
Featured

74 Reasons Why I Love My Best Friend

You can be yourself without having to explain yourself, because she accepts you and loves you just the way you are.

170978
Two women's hands with their small fingers interlocking

Have you ever found that one person in your life who you literally could not live without? You can talk to her about anything. She's the only person who will look you straight in the eyes and say, "You're stupid." You two can ride around or sit at your house for hours and always have something to talk about. You can be yourself without having to explain yourself because she accepts you and loves you just the way you are.

Keep Reading...Show less
Featured

8 Spotify Playlists To Get You In The Autumn Mood

The temperature may not be very Autumn-like, but these playlists sure are.

16129
Autumn Playlists
King of Wallpapers

Autumn is my favorite time of the year. The leaves change, pumpkin spice everything hits the shelves (thank you, world!), the 13 Nights of Halloween on Freeform (formerly abcfamily) and the temperature drops. Well, the temperature is supposed to drop. Being in south Alabama, however, means that the temperature may be relatively low early in the mornings, but you're still going to suffer in the afternoon. So if the weather outside isn't getting you in the Autumn mood, maybe these Spotify playlists will help you slip into that wonderful, Autumn state of mind.

Keep Reading...Show less
Black and white adult cat staring at the camera

As human beings, there are just some things that seem to bring us all together with the same sense of irritation. Here are a few of those annoying things that make my list. I'm sure at least some, if not most, of them make yours as well. If you can think of any more relatable annoyances that I've missed, feel free to comment on this article and let me know!

Keep Reading...Show less
Featured

First Snow

It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year!

15645
First Snow
Sorina Bindea

I have never understood why grown-ups complain when the leaves are all off the trees, and the temperatures take a decided turn towards the zero on the thermometer. I hear complaints about the impending winter weather, and the driving in the snow and ice. We live in Pennsylvania, so I bite my tongue instead of stating the obvious: Maybe you should move to a warmer climate?

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments