25 Things Your Server Would Much Rather Say Than, 'Thank You, Come Again!'

25 Things Your Server Would Much Rather Say Than, 'Thank You, Come Again!'

For every server who has kept their mouth shut one too many times.

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Working in the food industry can be incredibly irritating, especially when you deal with rude customers. Ask any server you know, I am almost positive they will share some crazy story about the time they were either yelled at for a mistake they didn't make, or for food they didn't cook being too undercooked.

Servers are told to just plaster a fake smile on their face because "the customer is ALWAYS right", but here are a few things servers would rather say than "Thank You, come again!"

1. Did this woman really just holler at me from across the restaurant while I was talking to another table!?

2. Do you not see me carrying over 1,000 f*cking things in my hand... I can't grab you another soda right this very second, actually. 

3. Damn, how much dressing on the side do you really need...

4. Did you actually expect your steak to be cooked like a five-star meal...where do you think you are sir, Paris?

5. I don't make enough money to run back and grab you an EXTRA lemon for your water

6. I'm sorry your burger was undercooked, but I'm actually not that sorry  because I DIDN'T make it

7. If you really don't like our healthier options than maybe you should just eat at home

8. Need faster service? Head to the drive-through in McDonald's instead!

9. Want a free drink because you didn't like the one I just took time making for you? Tough sh*t

10. Can you please teach your child how to behave in a restaurant, how old is he now? Ten?

11. If you didn't want your child purchasing a game on our tablet why would you let him/her play with it then?

12.I COULD grab you extra sauce for your pasta, but do I WANT to... 

13. Wow, I really can't wait for you and your family to leave!

14. This old woman really did not just yell at me for giving her a small portion of fries...

15. I hope another server never has to deal with the pain and stress you just caused me

16. I need a fat glass of wine after dealing with your pain in the as*

17. How is it possible to have a problem with every little thing I've brought out?

18. Boy... you would be so much cuter if you actually left me a 20% tip

19. You really expect me to carry all 6 dishes out at the same exact time?

20. No really, I love all random sass, please continue!

21. Ah, less than 20% tip 

22. No eye contact when we speak? Its fine I'm totally just here for fun 

23. Should I be the first to tell this woman her child just chucked a chicken tender across the room or...

24. Attention 12-year-olds! I have beef with your parents who raised you to act like this in a restaurant

25. I genuinely hope you never step foot in this restaurant again 

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​An Open Letter To The People Who Don’t Tip Their Servers

This one's for you.
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Dear Person Who Has No Idea How Much The 0 In The “Tip:" Line Matters,

I want to by asking you a simple question: Why?

Is it because you can't afford it? Is it because you are blind to the fact that the tip you leave is how the waiter/waitress serving you is making their living? Is it because you're just lazy and you “don't feel like it"?

Is it because you think that, while taking care of not only your table but at least three to five others, they took too long bringing you that side of ranch dressing? Or is it just because you're unaware that as a server these people make $2.85 an hour plus TIPS?

The average waiter/waitress is only supposed to be paid $2.13 an hour plus tips according to the US Department of Labor.

That then leaves the waiter/waitress with a paycheck with the numbers **$0.00** and the words “Not a real paycheck." stamped on it. Therefore these men and women completely rely on the tips they make during the week to pay their bills.

So, with that being said, I have a few words for those of you who are ignorant enough to leave without leaving a few dollars in the “tip:" line.

Imagine if you go to work, the night starts off slow, then almost like a bomb went off the entire workplace is chaotic and you can't seem to find a minute to stop and breathe, let alone think about what to do next.

Imagine that you are helping a total of six different groups of people at one time, with each group containing two to ten people.

Imagine that you are working your ass off to make sure that these customers have the best experience possible. Then you cash them out, you hand them a pen and a receipt, say “Thank you so much! It was a pleasure serving you, have a great day!"

Imagine you walk away to attempt to start one of the seventeen other things you need to complete, watch as the group you just thanked leaves, and maybe even wave goodbye.

Imagine you are cleaning up the mess that they have so kindly left behind, you look down at the receipt and realize there's a sad face on the tip line of a $24.83 dollar bill.

Imagine how devastated you feel knowing that you helped these people as much as you could just to have them throw water on the fire you need to complete the night.

Now, realize that whenever you decide not to tip your waitress, this is nine out of ten times what they go through. I cannot stress enough how important it is for people to realize that this is someone's profession - whether they are a college student, a single mother working their second job of the day, a new dad who needs to pay off the loan he needed to take out to get a safer car for his child, your friend, your mom, your dad, your sister, your brother, you.

If you cannot afford to tip, do not come out to eat. If you cannot afford the three alcoholic drinks you gulped down, plus your food, and a tip do not come out to eat.

If you cannot afford the $10 wings that become half off on Tuesdays plus that water you asked for, do not come out to eat.

If you cannot see that the person in front of you is working their best to accommodate you, while trying to do the same for the other five tables around you, do not come out to eat. If you cannot realize that the man or woman in front of you is a real person, with their own personal lives and problems and that maybe these problems have led them to be the reason they are standing in front of you, then do not come out to eat.

As a server myself, it kills me to see the people around me being deprived of the money that they were supposed to earn. It kills me to see the three dollars you left on a forty dollar bill. It kills me that you cannot stand to put yourself in our shoes - as if you're better than us. I wonder if you realize that you single-handedly ruined part of our nights.

I wonder if maybe one day you will be in our shoes, and I hope to God no one treats you how you have treated us. But if they do, then maybe you'll realize how we felt when you left no tip after we gave you our time.

Cover Image Credit: Hailea Shallock

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I Ranked 11 Fast-Food  Fries From Worst To Best, And Mickey D's DIDN'T Win

Going from worst to best, here is my controversial opinion on fast food fries, and no McDonald's is not the best.

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I firmly believe that nobody hates fast food, and the people that say they do are lying. These people do not mean that they hate the taste of the food but the repercussions of eating it, the consequences that one faces with the calorie intake or the intestinal issues lying ahead. Fast food, no matter how disgusting it makes you feel after, is delicious, especially the fries.

So, here is a ranking of the 11 fast food fries entirely based off of my opinion only, hence its controversy. There are some disgusting fries on this list in my opinion.

However, keep in mind that my definition of "disgusting" in this instance is that I would most likely still eat them if they were offered to me.

Steak and Shake (Dishonorable Mention)

Flickr

These thin pieces of cardboard potatoes can't even make it to number 10 on this ranking. One of my roommates loves these fries, and, just like Steak and Shake, she has garbage taste.

10. Burger King

Wikimedia Commons

I don't even know what to write for this one. No one cares, Burger King. You bore me. Next!

9. Dairy Queen

Wikimedia Commons

You go to Dairy Queen for blizzards, milkshakes, sundaes, but NEVER french fries.

8. Rally's

Flickr

These fries looks beautifully seasoned, but in reality they taste mediocre, hence their mediocre ranking.

7. Raising Cane's WITHOUT the sauce

Wikipedia

What. Is. THE POINT?

6. McDonald's

Wikimedia Commons

I am underwhelmed, McDonald's. I always have been. I always will be. You're fine, but I am just not McLovin' it.

5. Raising Cane's WITH the sauce

Wikimedia Commons

YES. Dip the fries in the Cane's sauce. Forget about McDonald's.

4. Chick-Fil-A

Wikimedia Commons

These are delicious and have a fun shape, but I still do not believe they deserve the best spot at slot 10. Come at me.

3. Five Guys

Pixabay

These fries are so greasy and awesome. You can slather them in vinegar, which not everybody loves, but I do! And this is my controversial ranking, so...

2. Wendy's

Wikimedia Commons

These fries taste likes real potatoes. French fries = potatoes. I am sorry, but McDonald's has got nothing on these perfect, fried slices of ACTUAL potato on Wendy's menu.

1. Arby's

Flickr

Beautifully seasoned and beautifully curly... Arby's has the best fries. @ me, I dare you.

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