1. Work Ethic
Probably the most valuable thing that my father taught me was work ethic. Anyone that knows him, knows him by this trait. His hands aren't torn up, his skin isn't burnt red and he's not drenched with sweat every day for nothing. I once heard him say this of his work: "I chose this." That may only be three simple words, but to me, they speak volumes. Every day, he makes a choice. He chooses to do what he does every day so that my sister and I can have the resources to pursue our dreams. He gives his whole family a better life because he takes that initiative, and everyone knows it.
If I want something, you'll never catch my dad letting me feel sorry for myself. If I don't get off my butt and work for it, I will most likely hear these words coming out of his mouth: "That's your own fault." And looking back now, I'm glad. I wasn't raised for average — but to pursue my dreams, by hard work. I wouldn't be graduating a year early or have had half the opportunities that I've had if it weren't for the work ethic my father instilled into me. Now, that's not to say that I always meet the mark, but it's a beautiful foundation.
2. Handouts
If you ever see my father accepting a handout, please take a picture because it's definitely not something I've ever seen in my lifetime. My dad didn't teach me to be content with little effort so that I could get my education handed to me for free, food next to nothing, and eventually, start a family abusing the system as well. He taught me that this is wrong and certainly not something to advertise. As a family with one daughter just having gone through college and one currently doing so, it's certainly not cheap. My parents work hard, and that comes with zero assistance. Now while that's annoying and ridiculous, that's OK — it's given me a greater appreciation for them and their investment.
3. Money Management
Looking back now, I wish I had listened to this more. As a fashion enthusiast, I've blown so much money that my father had warned me to save. As a teenager, you don't foresee half the expenses that you'll have in the future, and frankly, you don't care.
4. How To Love People
Anyone that knows my dad, knows that he's so, so loud. It's as if he's screaming into the phone. He's always joking about something, and he always has something to say to everyone he passes. While that quality can be embarrassing and annoying, it teaches me more and more every day and helps to continually mold me into a better person. One of the greatest joys in my life has been volunteering for Dream League with him. Being able to work alongside and share in the absolute bliss of that ministry with my dad is beyond words. It makes me love him even more and gives me a greater lens on His love for people — big or small, lovable or unlovable.
5. What A Real Man Is Like
My dad once told me something along the lines of, "You don't have a man yet because you're picky. You don't want no fool without a job and car." While that's true, that's just a start. It's the simple things like paying for the table's dinner and carrying my suitcase to the car, or making us laugh and finding joy in the little things in life. Then it's the foundational things like providing for our home. And not only that, but my dad has always, always made us feel protected. This seems simple, but the older I get, the more crucial this one becomes. I have never, ever had to know what fear in my home felt like. My father has always given my sister and I the simple relief of protection, along with so many other joys — the things that we have seen time and time again, that have shaped into an incredible male figure in our lives.
6. How To Eat
No one can deny this simple, but central love of our family. It binds us together and is the highlight of any gathering, obviously.
Here's to you, Dad — you're truly one of a kind, in so, so many ways (take that for what you will). Thank you for sacrificing so much for Cassandra and I, for instilling seeds in our lives that are still bearing fruit to this very day and days to come, for protecting and providing for us, and for being the perfect example of what a man should be. We love you beyond measure.
