It would seem that people are constantly fighting an internal battle of setting themselves apart or aligning themselves with others, trying to be independent and trying to belong. They try to organize themselves and others according to the environment they find themselves in, based upon any number of ideals; authenticity, efficiency, and harmony are only a few of these. I myself am fascinated by personality theory, but very few choose to recognize the limitations of these narrowly defined traits and personality types. If anything, choosing to define ourselves by personality tests and theories has the potential to cause great harm to our identities, our relationships, and even how we think and feel about major social issues like politics or religion. So while figuring out what someone's personality type is can be fun and amusing, there are a few boundaries to set in how far personality typing should go.
1. Your personality type should not be used for excusing antisocial behavior.
There are so many MBTI blogs and accounts on social media devoted to romanticizing personality types, slamming others, and making brash claims about which types are better than others, when this was never the intention of MBTI (or personality theory in general) in the first place.
The idea behind personality theory, through the lens of positive psychology, is to shed light on others' thoughts and behaviors and to give us the ability to understand and empathize with others more thoroughly. Setting types against each other like pop psychology enthusiasts do is the exact opposite of this ideal. But there is a theme in this divisive behavior, unfortunately most prevalent among my fellow introverts.
The types that are being romanticized are most often the introverted ones, the misunderstood ones, and the ones that are supposedly gifted in ways humanity could not begin to fathom. The types being slammed are the "simpler" ones, the common ones, the easily understood and the socially perpetuated. What does this mean? It means that, in a desire to feel unique and distinguished, the grand majority of these individuals have typed themselves as "special" types and subsequently given themselves the authority to belittle and besmudge the "simpler" types for having it easy, going with the flow, and overall contributing to the society the former types loathe so passionately.
How disheartening.
The most important thing to remember is that no matter what your type is, it should never be used to excuse negative or unproductive behavior. This is what I mean when I use the term "antisocial behavior". Each personality type comes with a set of strengths and weaknesses, positive traits and negative traits. When you use personality theory as the tool for self-improvement and understanding it was meant to be used as, you can maximize your strengths and work to counter your weaknesses. Doing these things helps create harmony in an environment and fosters coexistence. Try not to judge a person based on their type; rather, play to their strengths as well as your own.
2. Your personality type should not be used for making huge life decisions.
Two aspects of typology that interest people the most are type compatibility and viable career paths. This makes sense on the surface, because everyone wants the answer to questions like, "What kind of personality types can my type be happiest with?" and, "What jobs can I work toward that will fulfill me in life?" Unfortunately, personality theory can only attempt to predict compatibility and job satisfaction.
In relationships, compatibility is not something that just happens out of the blue. I hate to break it to those romantics in the world, but sometimes love is a choice (in terms of how you love, of course, not who you love). Compromise is not a bad thing in a relationship, unless you are compromising your personal values and independence. If you are with someone who shares your personal values and respects your time and space, you can be compatible with them regardless of their type. In short, if you love someone, and they love you, you are compatible. Personality theory cannot change that unless you allow it to. Secondly, always communicate with your loved ones about each others' needs and desires. They will disappoint you sometimes, and sometimes you will disappoint them; either way, conflict should not be confused with incompatibility. Conflict implies a solution. Incompatibility does not.
In career paths, the most rewarding thing you can do for yourself is love what you do. When you love your work, you're passionate about it, you find purpose and fulfillment in it, or you earn something from it like experience, a new skill, or even just the product of a job well done. Whatever the case may be, your type has nothing to do with determining what you do or don't love doing. This isn't to say that personality theory cannot offer suggestions or guidance for those searching for their dream job. However, if you are letting your personality type define your passions, you are setting yourself up for disappointment.
Making any major life decision, whether they are about careers, relationships, or anything having similar importance, should always be decided based on your personal values and needs. Remember, your personal values and needs came before your personality type did, not the other way around.
3. You personality type should not be used as a stand-in for your identity.
This sounds kind of weird at first, as your personality is a huge part of your identity. The point is that your personality, whether you speak of it in terms of typology or not, is not your whole identity. No personality type can fully capture the depth and potential of your existence, and you shouldn't let it (see #1). Personality type cannot account for your unique experiences, your choice of lifestyle, your likes or your dislikes, or anything of that sort. At best, learning your personality type can offer insight into the correlation between your thoughts and behaviors.
In particular, typology cannot predict who you choose to become. It can only offer possibilities, and roughly estimated probabilities, about your future. This is why your personality type cannot be used to excuse your negative and harmful behaviors. No matter what your flaws are, it is still important to hold yourself accountable for your mistakes and to try to remedy your shortcomings. Similarly, this is why your personality type cannot be used to determine compatibility and job satisfaction. Happiness, fulfillment, true love... all of these things are up to you and again, based in your personal values and needs.
No matter how loosely you utilize personality theory and typology, the study is still dichotomous in nature. The purest motive in understanding typology is to be proud of our differences and to bring them out in each other. In separating people into groups of types, some people are causing unnecessary division and prejudice. Because there is already so much of this prejudice in the world, it needs to be understood that creating new discrimination based on the fundamentals of cognition and behavior can only lead to more hatred. So while we celebrate our differences, we still need to value and remind each other of our sole uniting factor: our humanity.
