Being a lifeguard, you can get annoyed by some of the stupid questions people ask and the statements people make. Whoever said ‘there are no dumb questions’ was wrong. These, to me, are the most annoying.
1. “You need to put on more sunscreen, you look red / Do you wear sunscreen?”
Well thank you! I didn't realize! Obviously I wear sunscreen. But when you go in a pool it comes off. I reapply so many times a day but I get in and out of the pool every five minutes so sorry if I come home a little red.
2. “Have you saved anyone?”
Probably the most common questions lifeguards get asked. Does it really matter if I've saved someone? I’m qualified to save you if needed. Let me do my job please.
3. “Can you watch my kid? They don't know how to swim.”
This one is the worst. It’s not like I don't have a million other kids in the pool to watch but now I have to give your kid extra special attention because he can't swim.
4. “Do you drink enough water?”
This is a fair question but I get asked it ALL THE TIME so it gets very annoying. Yes, I am drinking enough water. No, you don't need to ask me but can you refill it?
5. “Why are you so tan?”
This is another great one. I am tan because I am sitting in the sun all day everyday so naturally I will be a little tan.
6. “Am I allowed to go in this pool?”
Whether there are zero kids or ten kids in the pool, someone always asks this question. If there are kids already in the pool obviously you can go in. If there are no kids in the pool just wait for the whistle. We do this everyday.
7. “That kid just pooped in the pool.”
This is actually a blessing in disguise. It sucks because well it's poop in the pool. But it's amazing because that means we have to close that pool for a little while. At camp we call it a golden nugget so it's also kind of fun to go on the walkie and say “We have a golden nuggets in the frog pool.” (The frog pool is our kiddie pool)
8. “Can I jump in?”
It’s a pool….yes...you can jump in. I wish I could say I was kidding and people don’t actually ask this. Unfortunately I get asked this question about a thousand times a day.
9. “Please, just 5 more minutes?”
When it is time for the kids to get out, whether it be for another group coming in or we need to close the pool, they almost always ask for more time. It is alway the same answer so I really don’t know why they even bother asking.
I love being a lifeguard but some of the things people say, I ask myself “do you think before you speak?” It’s really all common sense.
