Being away from my mom has been a really hard thing because all of these exciting, important things are happening in my life. I always find myself looking over my shoulder expecting my mom to be there whenever I need her. Since I don't get to see you as much now, Mom, here's a list of the things I want you to know.
I miss you:
I miss your hugs. I miss the little things you do that seem annoying, but are actually pretty cool. I miss the way you wake me up in the morning. I miss our shopping trips together. I miss your laugh and the way you would laugh at me. I miss having your shoulder there to cry and lean on whenever I needed it. I miss hearing your advice, even though I don't always listen to it. I miss talking to you every day I miss you always asking me for computer advice. I miss the way you sing with the radio, during movies, while you're cooking or cleaning or whenever really. I miss the way you can always tell when something's wrong. I miss the way you fall asleep as soon as you sit down anytime after 10 o'clock... you'll deny it, but it is so true. I miss the way you cry at literally everything (Are you crying yet?). I bet you are. I miss you.
I appreciate you:
I appreciate all of the bandaged cuts and bruises. I appreciate all of the tantrums you sat through. I appreciate all the sleepless nights when I was sick or upset. I appreciate all of the food you cook even if I don't like every meal (you know I'm a picky eater). I appreciate all of the unconditional love and support. I appreciate your patience when I'm being a brat. I appreciate how you're always there for me at the first sign of trouble, no matter what or where it is. I appreciate all of your hard work for hours and hours and then coming home to even more work. I appreciate all of the sacrifices you have made for me and this family. I appreciate all of the words of wisdom you've given to me so I can then pass them on to others. I appreciate your support of my passions, however short-lived they may be. I appreciate all the blood, sweat, and tears that you have put into making certain that I have the best life possible. I appreciate you.
I idolize you:
I idolize how you can be calm in stressful situations. I idolize the way you constantly put others before yourself. I idolize the loyalty and love you express in your daily life. I idolize the daily fight you undergo to be better always. I idolize the ability to find laughter and smiles in tough times. I idolize the attitude you hold of never letting anyone else tell you what you can and cannot do. I idolize how you have raised me and my sister with overwhelming love and encouragement. It has truly made us into the young women we are today; I do not doubt it for a moment. I idolize how you never give up on jobs, relationships, life. I idolize you.
I love you:
Even if I don't say it enough, I do. Even if we're upset with one another, I love you. Even if we haven't talked in a few days, I love you. If I forget a holiday or a birthday or another important event in your life, I suck but I love you. I remember when I was little, around the age of 5 or 6, we used to have this competition where we would go back and forth: "I love you" "I love you more" "I love you the most" "I loved you first" "I love you to infinity" "I love you to infinity plus one" "I love you all the way to the moon and back." We used to do that every night right before I would go to sleep. Even though we stopped doing that because I got older and you stopped tucking me in, I love you.
To the moon and back.
