I hate how much attention there is on romance in society. It’s disgusting.

Don’t get me wrong, I think romance is cute and sweet and all, but there’s way too much pressure on people to find it. I have so many friends who would complain about being single, or complain that they’ll be “forever alone”.

Have you ever stopped to consider how romantic relationships are so engrained into who we are as people? As social creatures I agree that relationships are super important to the human race, but why have we focused in on romantic relationships? Why aren’t platonic and familial relationships more important? Why did I spend a good chunk of my high school career waiting for someone to sweep me off my feet?

Maybe because every movie about high school- scratch that.

Maybe because every movie about anything tends to feature the protagonist having a relationship with someone. By the end of most movies the protag gets their babe. Why? Why don’t happy endings just be happy that the town is saved? That the main character survived? Why don’t we end movies with the protagonist having a new best friend? Sure not every movie is focused on the main character getting a sweetheart (except for the romance genre itself, most of those tend to focus on that.) but by the end it’s like the proverbial cherry on top. The romance genre itself finds a way to peak its head into almost every other genre. Horror doesn’t show up in every comedy. Action doesn’t find its way into romance. But romance can weasel in anywhere. Try watching a movie where a romantic relationship isn’t a subplot.

It drives me nuts because it gives off the idea that there is no complete happy ending without a Boo thang.

Looking away and pretending media isn’t a huge driving force in our beliefs and present day activities: Romance has been forced into our culture for centuries. The traditional lifestyle is to find that Love of your life, be connected to one another through some religious ceremony, and produce offspring.
How come it isn’t a normal idea to grow old by myself and spend my life working a job I love?

I’m not saying I never want to find someone to be romantically involved with, but I am saying I’m sick of feeling like that’s what I’m supposed to be doing.

And I feel like this pressure to fall in love is the cause for so many garbage relationships today. Some people just want to get in on relationship culture and will date anyone they’re remotely compatible with, which leads to fights later in the relationship, thus ending them or just providing an awful time for everyone around. This is especially true for teens and young adults. Media perpetuates the idea that you’ll find romance in high school, so when you get to be a Senior and you haven’t dated anyone you can’t help but feel like you messed up somewhere along the line. Kids are growing and they hear so much about romantic love they can’t help but want in on that. Watching movies like High School Musical totally set everyone in my generation up for failure because when it got to be New Years and I wasn’t singing karaoke with a stranger I felt like a total loser. (Also no one sang songs about Status Quo or performed choreographed dances at lunch so I was super disappointed with my high school career.)

My biggest problem with it is that it teaches people that they should put their self-value in the hands of another human. So much of my time was wondering why I wasn’t good enough to date anyone I even remotely liked. Asking myself what was wrong with me. Why I wasn’t lovable. Even today I sometimes catch myself thinking along those lines, then I remind myself that I am perfectly fine. There isn’t anything wrong with me. I just haven’t met someone under the right circumstances. I remember that I’ve never dated anybody and that I’ve accomplished many things. I realize these factors don’t correlate. Your value as a human has no relation to your romantic relationship or lack thereof.

Being single doesn’t mean you’re broken, it means you have more time to spend loving yourself. Because that is what you should really be focused on; Being the best you that you can be.