In 8th grade, I had a teacher who said “No matter how close you are with someone-doesn’t matter if they’re your best friend-you’ll never know what goes on behind closed doors.” That’s always stuck with me.
In social psychology, there is a theory that we call the ‘fundamental attribution error’. In short, it’s our tendency to link someone’s actions with their personality rather than the situation they may be in/going through. For example, you say ‘hi’ to your coworker in the hallway and she looks at you and keeps walking. You’re immediately thinking ‘what a bitch, how rude’, however you don’t consider that she may be having a bad day. Because you don’t know her dad’s in the hospital or that her boyfriend just dumped her or that her dog just died, you automatically assume her actions reflect her personality.
It’s simply human nature. We often only think of ourselves instead of taking a step back and thinking rationally.
I feel that’s why there’s a need to be kind now more than ever. The world can be an extremely ugly, painful place to live somedays. We need to try taking a step back when someone cuts us off in traffic or doesn’t respond to our text. It’s impossible to understand what someone’s going through whether they decide to share with you or not. People also handle grief and heartache in different manners.
In the words of Socrates, “Be kind. For everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.”
