The Unspoken Rules Of Roommate-Dom

1. There is a division of the room right down the middle; our messes stay on our side of that line.

2. I may not make my bed every day, but I promise that my room will be clean periodically (and not just for cleaning checks).

3. You can eat any of my food as long as you ask me BEFORE eating half the box.

4. Same goes for clothes. Please return to me that night, and I will wash it correctly.

5. We will tell each other if the outfit does not work and suggest alternatives.

6. We tell each other about every date we go on: the good, the bad, and the ugly.

7. If I come in and you are already asleep, I will leave all lights off and quickly and quietly get into my bed. I assume that you will be just as courteous.

8. If a light is necessary, the phone flashlight should never ever be directed toward the sleeping person.

9. If I wake up before you, I will spend the least amount of time possible in the room so as to not to disturb you.

10. Headphones are a must when we are both here.

11. If at all possible, snooze is only to be hit twice when one of us is still asleep.

12. If you plan on waking up before me, please set out the things you will need the night before to maximize sneakiness and quickness when getting ready for the day.

13. Musical instruments can be played during waking hours. (waking hours are defined as times when all residents are out of their beds)

14. If you are sick, you are quarantined to your bed. Please do not spread your germs to the rest of the apartment.

15. If you leave your dishes in the sink, I will always put your RINSED OFF ones in the dishwasher. I get it, sometimes life can get hectic.

16. We share the responsibilities to stock: the bathroom with toilet paper and soap; the kitchen with paper towels, dish soap, and sponges. If you do not participate in the buying of these shared goods, you will not have any when you need some.

17. I have every right to throw away your 3-month-old rotting cauliflower. If it no longer represents its original shape, it’s going in the trash.

18. If your food is unmarked and on my shelf, I can eat it.

19. If I am going on a late night food run, you are always invited. You reserve rights to shotgun and DJ duties.

20. When you have guests coming over, a heads up is welcomed and appreciated.