The Struggles of Being the Blunt Friend | The Odyssey Online
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The Struggles of Being the Blunt Friend

We're just being honest, sorry not sorry.

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The Struggles of Being the Blunt Friend
Dez Ruiz

I If I had a dollar every time I was told, "Did you really just say that?" or "You really need to work on your filter," I could probably pay for grad school without batting an eye. I'm shamelessly the blunt friend who is constantly having to apologize for things that come out of my mouth. I will definitely tell you if you have spinach in your teeth, a booger hanging from your nose, or think the boy you're talking to is bad news. Being the blunt friend is a struggle that comes with way too many assumptions and misunderstandings. Every person who is the blunt friend in their group knows the following statements a little too well.

People either LOVE or hate coming to you for advice.


Depending on how they handle honesty, people will either flock to you when they need help, or run the other way. People who like your honest self will always come to you because you will tell them the truth regardless of the situation. No sugar coating, no beating around the bush. People who are looking for advice that matches what they want to do, usually avoid asking you for advice because they know you'll tell them how it is.

Confrontation isn't a big deal.

Communication is a big priority for blunt friends, so if they have a problem with something, we have no problem addressing it. There's no such thing for "the elephant in the room" for us, because chances are we've already called it out. Ironically, this causes all people who aren't blunt, to feel an even bigger elephant in the room. We don't see confrontation as a negative thing and don't think twice about questioning people's actions.

Having to hold back "I told you so."



This has to do with the whole advice thing. Friends are very wary of telling us how their situation went if they didn't follow our advice. It's a struggle trying to hold back that slightly snotty, you should have listened to me, comment. I wish I could say I've gotten better at this, but what can I say? I'm a flawed individual.

Needing a disclaimer with every introduction.


Your friends are real champs for sticking with your honest personality, but they understand not every single person can handle it. Chances are, they'll give a disclaimer before introducing you to people such as, "I swear she's not a bitch," or "she really grows on you." Otherwise, people think you're satan in human form.

Small talk is the worst.


You know what's worse than listening to Nickelback? Pretending to care about stuff you don't. Our conversations of preference revolve around important issues that we care about. Things that are actually relevant and help us understand others. We could not care less about how the weather is or how traffic was. Talk to us about something interesting, don't waste our time with chit chat over shoes.

You have to be careful around new people.


You know how honest you are, and your friends have made it super clear that not everyone is ready for you. Being around new people, is literally like walking on eggshells. You try to do your best to come off as a friendly and welcoming person. Because you're trying super hard to make a good first impression and "tone yourself down," sometimes you feel like you aren't being your true self.

You don't understand sensitive people.


Being the blunt friend, you don't understand people who get offended by the truth. Especially if people are criers, you feel super uncomfortable and walk away, not understanding what the big deal is.

You have to explain when you're kidding.


Sometimes your joke can be confused as a sarcastic comment, when you're really just trying to be funny.

People being like, "you would like them, they're mean too!"


First of all, there's a huge difference between being mean, and being honest. This is a constant struggle we have to explain to people. The difference is your goal is not to be an asshole, you just value telling the truth, no emotions attached. You're responsible for being honest, but how people receive it, is totally on the other person. In fact, if someone's being completely rude, you'll shut it down immediately. Ain't nobody got time for that type of negativity and BS.

Your friends always knowing when you feel uncomfortable in a situation or don't like someone.


You're pretty bad at hiding at how you feel, or being able to have a poker face in situations. If you don't like the situation you're in, or the company you're with, everyone there knows.

People assume you hate everything.


Again, being honest and being hateful are two very different things. For the most part, we're pretty happy individuals who partake in a variety of activities. We're just not afraid to tell people when we think something is wrong or looks bad. Sorry not sorry.

You constantly get picked to be the bearer of bad news.

You've built a reputation of keeping it real, so that's all people expect when you talk. Since it's hard for you to be super emotional about things, you are always volunteered to be a messenger.

You value honesty.


You expect your friends to be as equally honest with you are you are with them. You don't get caught up in the emotional aspects of something, and you focus on the whole picture.

Despite our flaws, blunt friends are the best types of friendships any person can have. Our ability to be honest allows us to have the sincerest intentions and create incredible friendships. Because we value being as truthful as possible, we will only be friends with someone if we fully like them- there is no such thing as being "fake" with us. If we see someone as toxic or bad for us, we will cut off the friendship immediately. This creates a strong sense of loyalty and appreciation for all of our friendships in our lives. We will always stick up for our friends and support them through anything. We do our best to show our other friends that it's okay to have an opinion and speak up- even if others don't agree. We will push all of our friends to be stronger and better because we truly believe in them.

We know who we are, what we want and we don't believe in pretending to be something that we're not. If we're all being honest, is that really the worst thing in the world?


All GIF's Courtesy of: https://giphy.com/

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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