I am an introvert. In the world we live in today, it is so much easier to be an extrovert.

Introverts devote their energy to a small group of people who they care about most. They prefer small gatherings with their closest friends rather than giant parties. They enjoy alone time and are overwhelmed by being in a crowd for too long. They live more in their minds and are energized by topics they feel passionate about.

I hate small talk. Small talk is something that is essential to meeting new people and interacting with people you aren’t close with. I make myself make small talk anyway, but it makes me incredibly uncomfortable. This doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy meeting people. I like deep, meaningful conversations. When I meet someone, I like to know the good stuff. I want to know what your passions are, your insecurities, your relationship with your family, what make you angry, your fears, your loves, the inner mechanisms of you.

Also, I love being around people, but sometimes I need a break. My first week of college, I was with people all the time, going to orientation activities, but there was a point when I was so exhausted, I just had to go to my room and have a little me time for a couple hours. The thing was, I was terrified of missing out, because most people were out there making friends all the time and becoming closer to one another, while I was recuperating in my room.

Also, being an extrovert helps a lot when it comes to getting a job. A lot of people get hired from good interviews and because of their personality. As an introvert, it takes some getting to know me before my personality comes out. There are times I wish I had the courage to be outgoing right off the bat. It’s not like I’m quiet or shy. That doesn’t define an introvert. It’s just that I’m afraid to show you my true colors until I get to know you.

So many times people think I’m quiet, shy, rude or awkward, but I’m none of those things. I love people, and I want friends as much as the next person. I just want to skip the getting-to-know-you part, and I need time alone every once and awhile.

It’s hard, sometimes, being an introvert in an extroverted world. I know there are plenty of people out there like me though, and that’s comforting. I try and try to be as extroverted as I can sometimes, but it makes me so uncomfortable. I’ve realized I need to accept who I am. I still make an effort to meet and talk to new people, because it’s important, but I shouldn’t feel bad about wanting alone time occasionally and wanting to know the real you.