This is the first time I have brought this to the attention, of well, anyone, but I am in the midst of writing a book. Like a whole entire book. I know, it sounds crazy. But a few months ago, I got this idea, and I decided to run with it. It has been a roller coaster of emotions, and sometimes tedious. It is grueling and hard and sometimes, even boring. But it also is the most rewarding when I get new ideas, or I re-read a section and fall in love with that scene all over again. I wanted to share exactly what it is like, so here are just some of the emotions I go through any given time that I am working on it.
1. Getting Inspiration
Finding inspiration is hard. It cannot be forced out of you. It comes organically in sometimes the most inconvenient ways. For me, it happened at times where I didn’t have anything to jot my thoughts down, so I sat there repeating my ideas in my head because I am prone to forget. When you feel inspired it triggers something in your head, and hopefully if it is really good, it will trigger something in your heart, and you just know — this is what I am meant to write about.2. Determination
Once that inspiration hits, it is full steam ahead. You feel like your thoughts are uncontrollable, and most of it does not even make sense the first time because the words cannot get out fast enough onto the screen. You wish that this feeling never goes away, and you do not want to stop for anything because if you did, chances are this feeling would be gone.
3. Dealing With Writer's Block
After having that glorious time when you knew what you wanted to say and you knew how everything was supposed to be, you freeze. Suddenly, you are dumbfounded and your thoughts go completely silent. It is a dark time for a writer, but this point is the most crucial. This is where you push your own limits, push your own boundaries, make yourself uncomfortable with thoughts you never imagined you'd see on paper. Most of the time, this is where you find magic.
4. Getting Back Into It
5. Having ALL The Feels
This is your creation, your baby, YOU brought it to life. So it is easy to be overwhelmed when something dramatic happens in a scene or to a character. And many times there are parts of your own life and characteristics into the storyline, which makes it all the more personal. Honestly, you become a true Genzlinger.
6. Falling In Love With Yourself
I have had this repetitive thought process that everything I do is average, or satisfactory. I have never been the most successful or talented at anything. I never thought that my ideas would ever be important enough to put out there. But I took that first step, and I have finally found my voice within my words. It is crazy how writing this book made me even more sure about who I am and what I want in life. This book in a way has made me more of an adult than I thought it ever could. This book has made me love myself because I finally found something that (fingers crossed) I am more than average at.
Of course, there are more stages in the writing process, and stages I have not even had to face yet.
But it is a journey, and I cannot imagine my life on any other one.
