Body shaming sucks to say the least. I'm sure everyone has been picked on growing up based on how you look. Maybe you were "too short" or "too tall". Either way, kids seem to like to pick out differences in others, and, sometimes, in the worst way possible.
In U.S. culture, appearances are everything. Everywhere we go, there are fashion ads, weight loss commercials and laser clinics. What is considered beautiful is taught to us by the media from a young age. I do not remember ever seeing a happy, complex fat character on TV or in my collection of books. If they were fat, there was always a weight loss storyline attached, where the character's life wouldn't begin until they lost enough weight to be considered "beautiful".
For decades, the ideal standard of beauty has been toned or thin able-bodied people with light skin and smooth hair. Models who look like this are plastered in magazines and billboards. Our favorite TV shows are centered around characters who fit this ideal. We see nothing but thin and toned bodies.
The more I write about body positivity, the more "all bodies are beautiful" statements I see. And, while I absolutely agree that all bodies are beautiful in their own way, I feel like this blanket declaration fails to name the problem that has caused the need for radical body love in the first place.
Our society glorifies one type of body. Anyone who doesn't fit this ideal type is left out and made to feel ashamed for living with a body that "isn't beautiful or worthy of love". It's those bodies that society deems as disgusting and unwanted that need the be addressed and embraced as beautiful.
Because of this, I have to say it: skinny shaming is not equal to fat shaming.
Yes, it sucks to be torn apart by others for your body. I would never say that your experiences with body shaming isn't valid, but those interpersonal interactions are just that: interpersonal.
For fat people, the ridicule does not end with one interaction. We get hate on the internet by being told that we're lazy, ugly, and disgusting. We see fat people made jokes and pariahs on TV. We're less likely to be hired for a job we are qualified for because we are fat. Doctors overlook signs of serious illnesses or diseases to blame every symptom on our size. People laugh and take condescending pictures in front of plus size models.
Just as the "all lives matter" argument dismisses systemic racism, the desire to critique fat positive and for not saying that all bodies are beautiful completely disregards the oppression and stigma that fat people face. At one point in time, maybe this was all different. In the middle ages, larger bodies were beautiful and thinner bodies were considered ugly. However, in this modern age, things are quite different, as I have mentioned above.
We aren't going to change the culture around bodies if we don't take a look at what the actual problem is with how our culture treats bodies. In order to end all body shaming we have to end the system that glorifies one type of body as the ideal beauty standard. In order for "all bodies" to be beautiful, we have to start seeing the "ugly" bodies as beautiful. We have to start loving fat bodies.
