I have tan skin, curly hair, and hazel eyes. Every single day, someone asks me where I’m from, and out of spite, I’ll say the name of my hometown sometimes, but I know they’re not asking me where I live, but they’re asking me why I look the way I do. At first glance, people assume I’m Spanish, but I’m actually Peruvian, Colombian, and Swedish—a whole smorgasbord of countries.
My whole life I identified as white. I went to a private school where I was a minority, but I didn’t even realize it. It wasn’t until college that I realized people did not identify me as white. A boy who lived down the hall from me asked me if I was Latina; I couldn’t understand why he just assumed I was Latino considering that I had never been asked if I was before. The next couple weeks, this continued, not just with friends, but with everyone wherever I went. That’s when the realization dawned on me that back home, people were used to the way I looked and knew that my father was blond and blue-eyed and that I was not just Latino.
I had never really known Latino people outside of the family and my mother’s close friends, so coming to college and being placed into a racial group every time I walked into a room was a little unsettling. It shocked me when men labeled me as spicy or exotic, like some kind of ethnic dish ready for them whenever.
As the months went by, my close friends at college didn’t place me in a racial group, I was just “Kat” to them. This feeling of placement faded, but soon emerged again when I realized that when friends brought me home, they were bringing the “Latina girl” home to meet their parents.
A close friend was asked by a boy she was dating, “Where is your Spanish friend?” She had no idea who he was talking about until he began to describe me, and she came to her senses and merely responded “Oh.”
The TV show, "Devious Maids" hosted by Lifetime TV is satire comedy that depicts the lives of Latina maids who work for the upper class. Each character is this overly sexualized "devious" version of a woman who cleans and cooks to her heart's content. This show is mocking the perception people have of maids and of Latinas, and with an intriguing plot the show has become huge a success. Despite the fact that it's satire, it still unsettles me that the main attribute of these women is their beauty and their bodies.
I am proud to be part Latina, but I don't want women of Spanish-speaking countries to be seen as just an object. Our skin color, texture of our hair, and rhythm are not our only attributes.
Starting my junior year of college this fall, I’ve accepted that my physical characteristics may identify me largely as Latino and I’m perfectly all right with that. I am proud to be bi-racial. My race is not something that constitutes who I am, but it does play a large role in how I am perceived. I don’t fall into any stereotypes, but that doesn’t make me any less Latino. I love reggeaton and salsa music. I love rice and beans. I use my hands when I talk, and I'm very affectionate. However, do these qualities of mine or my preferences make me Latino—or do they just make me who I am?
