If you've lost a parent and you're reading this, let me just say that you are STRONG. You are stronger than you could have ever imagined. Even on the days that nothing goes right and you feel that the world is against you ... remember this: You are STRONG. You are INSPIRING. I know that sometimes none of this seems fair, and you will always wonder "why me?" I can't take the hurt away, but I can help you through it. So, if you're struggling, here's some things I've come to realize the past ten years.
Time does not heal all wounds.
I wish I could say that it gets better. But, the truth is that it really doesn't. It's gonna hurt, and it's gonna hurt every day. Some days might be a little tougher than others, but every day is hard.
IT IS OK TO CRY.
Crying does not make you weak; it makes you strong. This could very well be the hardest thing you ever go through in life, and sometimes you're just gonna have to let it all out. With that being said ... cry. Cry every day if you have to.
A little jealousy is normal.
I know that seeing children with two living, happy parents can stir up a little resentment. I've been there.
Heartbreaks are still going to hurt.
When I was going through my first heartbreak, I wanted nothing more than my dad to show that boy who's boss. You will yearn for that protective-parent figure.
Finding old pictures of them is like buried treasure.
Hold on to all pictures, home videos, old t-shirts, and everything in between. Treasure them. You'd be surprised how big of a smile you can get from looking at pictures.
Sorry doesn't mean the same thing anymore.
At some point, you will realize just how many times you've been told "I'm so sorry." At that moment, all you can do is say "thank you" and realize that all the apologies in the world will not make a difference no matter how much you want them to.
It is ok to be happy.
Don't ever think that your person in heaven wouldn't want you to be happy. It is possible to get your happiness back without forgetting about them.
The truth is that it will ALWAYS hurt and nothing can take that pain away. It's been 10 years without my dad, and it still stings as if it were the first day. Because of that, I have found myself. I found the person I always wanted to be, and I was even more encouraged to become that person because I knew it would make him proud.
Dear Daddy,
I just want to say thank you. Thank you for the eight years I had with you. Thank you for giving me your squinty eyes. Thank you for giving me your big personality. (I can only hope that I can light up the room the way you were able to.) Thank you for protecting me from above. Thank you for giving me your smile. Thank you for being my best friend, then and now. Most importantly, thank you for being my dad. I could never thank you enough for all the things you have given me, but I can try. It's been 10 long years without you, and I miss you more every day. But, I know I'll see you again someday. I love you so.
Love, your baby girl
