Some people live their entire lives in a circle.
What do I mean by that? I mean they quite literally fall into vicious cycles of repeated behavior.
How does this happen?
How do you detect it?
How do you recognize it in others?
How do you stop it?
When is it a good thing? Is it ever?
This happens with lack of reflection. Reflection is often neglected because nobody likes to think about when they make mistakes and/or when they might be in the wrong. On the flip side, when something’s going good we just repeat, settle, and naturally don't strive for more. To put it more simply, ignorance is bliss…until it’s not. Not having moments of reflection strips you from the ability to become one with yourself. It restricts you from learning about yourself and those around you. It limits you from fulfilling your greatest potential.
To catch yourself in this cycle and end it, you must first recognize you are doing it. So right now think about the last time you studied yourself or analyzed those around you. Do you have passion for something? Why? Do you love someone? Why? Do you hate someone? Why? Start getting comfortable digging and asking questions.
To see it in others is much easier. You can see someone stuck in cycles much easier than seeing yourself doing it. When you start trying to avoid this habit, it can be frustrating to watch those around you not develop as quickly. Patience is important, people were patient with you as you were, and are, learning, so be patient with them.
Over time, these type of reflection strategies will replace your cycling habits. You will be able to learn from situations after dissecting them. You can pull apart what was good and should be repeated and what was not and could be learned from. Repeated behavior can be good. Consistency usually is, but to realize that something you are doing is good, you must pin point what part of it is good.
So take time, a few minutes, some me-time. Reflect on who you have been, who you are, and who you want to be. I have done this via journal which I highly recommend, but if that is not for you, try meditation or an activity that sends you into a state of bliss. Just a few minutes where you don’t need your phone or another person. Relax and work on you. Helping yourself will help those around you as well. Be an example. Keep growing.
