We've all heard people say, "I found the love of my life on Tinder." But how often do people say this? And how often do people actually mean it?
As a joke, I downloaded Tinder just last week. My friends and I saw so many different types of profiles. People try their best to show people what they look like at their prime. It takes some time to pick and choose what pictures will attract attention. I've seen guys pose with electric guitars, puppies, shirts off in front of the mirror, and even with their kindhearted mothers. Of course, each picture will elicit a different response. But they are all like I said, people at their "prime." So why do people think they will find their future boyfriends/girlfriends/spouses on Tinder? It's crazy to think that swiping right on a photo of a person looking their best is the best way to meet someone you'll end up with.
First of all, people can say anything they want. They can message you with a cheesy pickup line, like: "did it hurt when you fell from heaven?", a sexual comment, or a dumb cliche, like "you are the most beautiful girl in the world." But you have to take everything with a grain of salt because most of these guys are copying and pasting this same line to every message conversation.
The worst part about Tinder is that it's strictly shallow. If you like the way a person looks, you message them. Of course, it makes sense to be interested in someone you're physically attracted to, but you have no idea what the person is really like. He or she could look like a nice person but they could really be borderline psychotic.
Picture this: You've been messaging a guy for a few weeks now, never face timed, maybe had a few calls here and there, some goodnight and good morning texts. And one day he texts you that he wants to meet up. You spend hours prepping as if you're ready to meet the love of your life. You want to find the perfect outfit and the perfect hairstyle to impress this perfect stranger. When you get into his car, your gut feeling sinks in- this guy is not who you expected. His car reeks of smoke and there's a giant trunk that is completely empty. It's dark, and you're trapped in a closed vehicle breathing the same air as this guy you consider to "know" very well. But you really don't. There could be various conclusions to this story. It could end really well and you end up spending the rest of your lives together, or he could take you to a dark alley and murder you. Okay, the latter is a little extreme but you get my point. There's no certainty in it.
I was messaging a guy for only 2-3 days and didn't think anything of it. I have heard about Tinder and all the horror stories so I wanted to see how it was for myself. When I continued messaging him, my gut kept telling me "no, stop!" He said he wanted a "long-term relationship" and I didn't really. He also proceeded to say he would buy me Christmas gifts, and keep in mind, this is before we even met. I had to cancel my plans with him because it was all too much at once. There are crazy people out there, and just because someone seems cool based on a few pictures and a few messages doesn't mean they actually are. According to The Guardian, 42% of people using Tinder are already in a relationship. Essentially, 42% of Tinder users are liars. And people could be lying about all other aspects of their lives too besides their relationship status. They could say they're looking for a relationship with you but be messaging 10 other girls at once. You never know when someone is just playing you or if they are real or not. That goes for relationships in real life too, but with Tinder it's even harder to figure out the truth.
So, if you're looking for a real relationship maybe try finding one on your own, or you could defy the odds. And maybe, you won't find a tool or a serial killer sitting across from you on your first dinner date.