We all know what I’m talking about—a couple that seems perfect in every way. They are both good looking, they are accomplishing all of their goals, they always seem so happy and lovey-dovey. It doesn’t seem like they ever run into a problem or get into an argument. They don’t seem to have a care in the world, and being together just comes naturally and easily.
I’m here to tell you that is all complete crap.
Think about it for a second. Have any of your closest relationships, romantic or platonic, been a complete breeze? Have you ever had a relationship that has never hit any bumps in the road? If you answered yes to either of these questions, you either have to be lying to yourself or you haven’t gotten as close to this person as you can.
That’s what you do when you enter into a relationship with someone—you push the limits. You test the water in order to get more comfortable and relaxed with each other. With that comes lines that may be crossed or boundaries that may be pushed too far.
Relationships are a balance. Finding and maintaining that balance all on its own is a hard enough challenge. It requires work and trust. You have to know yourself and care enough about the other person to let them into your life so deeply. It isn’t so easy to be so intimate with someone. More often than not assumptions can be made and feelings can be hurt in the process.
Not only can finding the balance be hard but dealing with life’s pressures with another person can also be difficult. I know that during five years of being together, my boyfriend and I have already faced many struggles together. We’ve been through each of our mothers getting sick, family relationships falling through, going to schools across the country from each other, and my ongoing fight with my mental health, to name a few.
The act of constantly giving and taking support from your partner can be exhausting and straining in a relationship. That is totally normal. Relationships are supposed to be hard because if they weren’t, relationships wouldn’t be meaningful and lasting.
If there is no such thing as the "Perfect Couple," why does everyone think it is real?
I feel as though the main reasons as to why relationships seem to be perfect when they’re not is our use of social media. On social media, people can mold and shape their lives to how they want to be portrayed: happy, rich, successful, tons of friends, constantly going to parties and having a lot of fun.
Too often it happens that when a couple breaks up, take a celebrity couple, for example, people are up in arms. They cannot believe it because the couple was so happy! They just went on vacation together, they just celebrated an anniversary. It just goes to show that you never know what is going on behind closed doors in the actual relationship.
I just want y’all to know that if you are going through a rough patch with your significant other and you’re scrolling through your feed and you see all these other couples having the time of their lives...more than likely you are not seeing the whole story.
Stop comparing your relationship to other relationships. The perfect relationship doesn’t exist. Trying to reach perfection just causes an unnecessary pressure in your relationship and makes things harder than they have to be. If you are looking for love, stop trying to find perfection. Find someone that makes you happy and makes you the best version of yourself. If you do that, I promise you won’t regret it.
