This past year, I’ve struggled with allowing so many people into my life that I may not have been prepared to welcome yet. I’ve shed many tears and stayed up late letting my mind think through every situation that I’ve encountered. Maybe this is the conclusion of what that has all built up -- the overnight thinking that gets the best of all of us. It usually happens around 1-3 AM, you’re laying in bed unable to fall asleep. You want to sleep because it’ll help and stop everything that is bothering you. But simply, your mind doesn't allow that.
I definitely learned things the hard way this year but I’d like to say that’s the only way you can actually learn from it. I used to admire the word simplicity; because I enjoyed my life being that definition. I didn’t like change, I didn’t like the unknown, and I didn’t like when things didn’t go my way. I was afraid of it all. But now, you’re probably wondering, "Why are you discussing this?" I’m telling you all of this, I’m writing all of this, because that word doesn’t actually exist. Nothing is simple, no one is simple in fact everyone is so complex. Nothing comes easy and unfortunately it's the people that you want to be around and want you to make you happy that are usually the most toxic. A few signs of a toxic person can be one (or probably a few) of the following:
1) Guilt Tripper
2) Manipulator
3) Pleading, Begging & Repeating something until you are tired
4) Empty Promises
5) Lying
6) Doesn’t bring positivity
You shouldn’t feel guilty from walking away from these people simply because it is your life. It doesn’t matter who that person is to you -- you don’t have to make room to accompany them and their dark cloud. You shouldn’t have to go day by day wondering what you did to make them upset or having the pain they bring you drenching you. But remember this: it’s one thing for a person to own up to their issues but it’s another thing to actually change. If they continue to disregard feelings and ignoring boundaries, they HAVE to go. I’ve learned to be kind, move away fast and let life educate them. Always remind yourself that there are two types of people in this world: those who inspire and those who drain you. Decide which one of those the people who surround you are. Until then, here are a few ways to handle toxic people:
1) Set boundaries.
2) Pick your fights.
3) Rise above it.
4) Don’t let anyone limit your happiness.
5) Focus on the situation, don’t focus on how crazy someone is.
6) Forgive but never forget.
7) Squash negativity!
8) Use your support system, your friends are here for you!
People do need people, I won’t deny that. But the people you need are the good kind of people, not the ones that make you double think your own worth. So together, let’s delete those who are toxic faster then we delete failed attempt essays.
