To The Man Who Will Love Me

To The Man Who Will Love Me

Understand this, I don’t know if you are in my life from this point on till eternity or if you are simply here for a sweet while with a dramatic exit, and I do not care.

Shelby Packard

Whoever you are,

Understand this, I don’t know if you are in my life from this point on till eternity or if you are simply here for a sweet while with a dramatic exit, and I do not care. Not because I am not capable of falling in love but because if you have made it so far to love me then you understand I do not love with possession. All I ask of you is to put yourself first, be selfish, go for what you want without hesitation; a relationship should never be an obstacle in your life. Maybe in the past relationships only taught you that love meant you needed them, but I don’t want you to need me, I want you to just simply want me. Choose me because my company is sweeter than others, don’t choose me because you depend on me that will never last and will only wear us both out.

Maybe I am different but sharing true love with someone does not mean that every day from here on out I get to wake up next to you, if I do that is just another thing to be grateful for but if other things in life are calling you, go for them. Loving me isn’t suppose to be “settling down,” it is suppose to be easy and free. To me promising forever is cliché and demanding, why add the stress? Personally I am just going to enjoy this moment right now of us eating cereal on the kitchen floor at midnight and if tomorrow I have to leave or you have to leave I’ll say thank you for the beautiful memory and good luck because you already gave me so much more than anyone else ever could and to hold onto that just to wear it out and suffocate it would be a shame.

Don’t get me wrong if you love me I will love you fiercely and do whatever I can to make it work, but to love fearlessly means I can also say goodbye and be fine, but isn’t that why you chose to love me? I am not looking for a half because I know I am already whole and for you to even catch my attention I realize you are the same, so love me but let me be free. Too often I watch couples consume each other and they call that beauty, but how is losing yourself in someone else and coming out lost beautiful when you could never be yourself that way? I don’t ever want us to be that. I will never be jealous or dictate what you do, don’t ever assume it is because I do not care. Just know that if you love me I know you respect me and chose me for a reason, I don’t need to build walls around you to keep you in. Couples are suppose to make each other better but I will never force you or tell you what to do because I have some unrighteous idea of what kind of man you should be. If you love me you already told me everything you aspire to be and it is only my job to remind you in times you forget, it isn’t my job to polish you and sculpt you to be it. I am stubborn and independent and I may not gush over you like girls in the past, I may not ever show possession over you, but I promise if you love me, I am constantly admiring everything about you. I am constantly watching how you interact with others, how you hold yourself, and what makes you smile and nod your head. Thank you for loving me and accepting me for all I am and my nonconventional ideas on love, I can’t wait to meet you.

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